Time, Perspective, and Type 2 Fun (9-22-25)

A bottle of white liquid pouring out of a dropper

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Happy Monday!

You’re getting a blog on Monday, because I’m going to do a few things for work this morning, and then I’m taking the rest of the week off. Last week was about making the most of a situation. This week is about time, perspective, and type 2 fun.

Recap: Diane and a 4-month-old Alice are living with my parents. It’s chaos. My wife is looking at potential houses to buy, which is totally stressing her out. My dad goes with my wife to check out houses to help out with Alice. Anyway, they go to a house and long story short, my dad knocks over the bottle of Alice’s milk and gets it all over the dining room table in the house. This takes an already stressful situation and makes it worse. They are frantically cleaning it up, and Diane is worried about potentially ruining someone’s table and is feeling more overwhelmed than ever. Ultimately, everything is okay. Fast forward a few hours, and the milk spilling incident has turned from super stressful to hilarious. They tell the story to my mom when she comes home, and everyone is laughing. Fast forward to today, and the milk spilling incident is one of our favorite stories to tell.

Let’s connect some dots. When you read the story above, I hope you smiled or chuckled a bit. It’s kind of funny. It’s also a situation we can all relate to. Maybe you didn’t spill milk, but we’ve all made a mess which turned a stressful situation into something even worse. However, with a little time and perspective, we can begin to see the humor in the moment. My family calls these kinds of things type 2 fun, a phrase we learned from a friend. Type 1 fun is when the situation is enjoyable and funny as it happens. Type 2 fun is when the situation is bad at the moment, but later on you see the joy and humor in it. As I get older, I’ve learned that most initially stressful situations in life end up as Type 2 fun.

The challenge: When you run into something tough/stressful/bad will you be able to create the distance and perspective to see the joy and humor?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Finishing Strong, Resting, and Being Mindful of our Pace (11-20-24)

This week we are going to have a one-off entry about finishing the year strong and reflecting on running races, our pace, and finish lines.

Let’s say that I’m running a race. I just passed mile marker 12 and the next marker will be 13.1. Should I go all out and sprint until I hit 13.1 miles? It depends on how far the race is. If it’s a half marathon, then 13.1 miles is the finish line. I can go all out, because after that I’ll have days and weeks of recovery before I push myself that hard again. If it’s a marathon, then 13.1 miles is only halfway, and going all out will only exhaust me and decrease my chances of finishing strong without injuries.

What does this have to do with anything? How many times have you heard, “We need to finish the year strong!” during a staff meeting, a town hall, etc.? Per our race analogy, when we think about finishing strong, we need to understand where the finish line truly is. We need to adjust our pace and effort based on where the finish line is and our ability to rest and recover.

Earlier in my career, I felt like Q4 was a true a finish line. Finishing the year strong meant sprinting hard AND knowing that I’d have time to recover and would be able to ease into the next year before sprinting right away again. Over the past few years, I’ve come to feel like there really isn’t a clear finish line anymore. Just the other day someone was talking about how Q4 isn’t the end of the year but is really just the kick-off to having a strong Q1. It’s like everything blurs together into a frantic frenzy. I end up going all out in Q4 only to find myself spending the holidays sick, burned out, and exhausted both physically and mentally. By the time the new year rolls around, I’m still not recovered, and I’m being asked to start sprinting right away. Does that sound familiar? Somewhere there must be a happy medium, where we work hard without running ourselves into the ground and starting the next year burned out from the moment it starts. Somewhere, there has to be a happy medium where we take care of ourselves and each other.

Challenge 1: How can we all be more mindful of our pace and its sustainability as we close out the year?

Challenge 2: How can you lead and set a pace that is sustainable? (Ex: When is the last time you clearly told your team that you don’t want them to run themselves into the ground, and made trade-off decisions where you would be okay with some things not getting done?)

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Recharging and Mental Health (10-2-24)

Last week I finished the series on lessons I’ve learned from therapy. This week I want to touch on one more mental health lesson, before moving to new topics. Today, I want to touch on the importance of recharging for our mental health.

Let me start by saying that everyone is okay. Here’s the story. On Friday, I drove a few hours away for an obstacle course race on Saturday. On Saturday morning around 1am, I received a text that a family member was in the hospital. I packed up and drove the 3.5 hours home to see what was going on. It was a long day of waiting and little sleep. Eventually, I felt good about everything and went home.

When I got home I sent a couple of emails to folks letting them know what was going on and that I wouldn’t be at work on Monday. Then, the guilt started to set in. On Saturday night and Sunday morning this little voice started whispering, “You’re really behind at work. You’re going to be even more behind, because you aren’t working on Monday. You should start doing work right now. You’re not doing anything else right now. You’re just staying at the house. You’re just sitting there. You could be doing work to catch up.” Have you ever had something like this happen to you? Have you ever heard guilt whisper to you like this?

For a moment, I almost gave into that voice. Then, I paused for a second and I assessed how I was feeling. I was sleep deprived, physically tired, and emotionally exhausted. Working is not what I needed. I wasn’t sitting around doing “nothing”. I was recharging. I was catching my breath. I was taking care of myself. I was being present with my family. After embracing these things, I let go of the urge to work.

What does this have to do with anything? I don’t know about you, but it’s easy to get lost in the hustle and grind. It’s easy to subscribe to this idea that we should be doing something every moment of every day to better ourselves and deliver for the business. This is the same mentality that leads to burnout. We don’t always need to be running ourselves into the ground. We need to challenge that voice of guilt. We need to embrace that sometimes we need to do “nothing”. Sometimes, we need to slow down, reconnect, and recharge for our own sake and for the sake of others.

The challenge- Will you allows yourself to recharge when you need to?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Therapy and Acknowledging Things are Heavy (8-28-24)

Carrying A Heavy Weight Stock Photos, Pictures & Royalty-Free Images ... Last week was about therapy and being brave enough to ask for help. Thanks for everyone who reached out with kind words, and I’m proud of everyone who is committed and/or recommitting to therapy and taking care of themselves. This week is about therapy and acknowledging things are heavy.

After the initial part of our conversation, my therapist asked me to talk more about what was going on. I started listing everything off. “I have these 3 things going on with each kid, and there’s no playbook for this. Everything is on fire at work, AND there are 4 to 5 challenges I’m trying to sift through and navigate. There are these 3 other things happening in life. My shoulder is in constant pain. I haven’t been working out. I can’t even tell you the last time I slept well. I feel like crap. I’m focusing on holding it together, so I can keep stuff moving.”

After listening to me rattle off all those things, my therapist looks me in the eyes and says, “That’s a lot.” I immediately discount her comment and in complete seriousness reply, “It’s nothing special. All that is just another Tuesday.” She hears me say this. She hears me discount her original statement. She looks me in the eyes again and says something like, “It’s a lot. Even if it’s not one huge event it is still a lot of things to carry, and it’s a lot of weight. It’s a lot to carry for any human.”

What does this have to do with anything? This was the beginning of one of my first epiphanies from therapy. I had been so consumed by just trying to make it day to day that I had lost all perspective. I had failed to realize that all of these things were adding up. Has this ever happened to you?

The moment my therapist acknowledged that I was carrying heavy weight it opened my eyes and shifted how I felt about myself. I wasn’t weak. I was carrying a lot of heavy things. It also reinforced that I’m human, we are all humans, and being overwhelmed at times is just part of the broader human experience. Have you ever felt overwhelmed like this?

The challenge: Will you appropriately appreciate and recognize the weight you are carrying? Will you embrace that it’s okay if heavy things feel heavy? Will you remember that you aren’t weak, sometimes things are heavy?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Lies of P, Poison Levels, and Stress (3-20-24)

Last week was about blaming the controller vs taking accountability. This week is about Lies of P, poison levels, and stress.

My kids were watching me play, and they noticed that I started losing health. They were confused, and they asked me why I was losing health even when the monsters weren’t hitting me. I explained to them that the area I was in was full of poison (called Corruption in the game). At first, the poison doesn’t do anything. It just slowly builds up. However, once it hits a critical limit, the poison begins damaging my character, and my health quickly fades. In order to survive, I needed to equip poison resistant armor, use items that reduce poison, and find safe places where there wasn’t poison.

What does this have to do with anything? Instead of it being a level in a video game, let’s call it work or life. Instead of it being poison in a video game, let’s call it stress. Similar to my video game, the stress level builds over time. At first, I don’t even notice it. The levels rise over time, and then all of a sudden it hits HARD. Anyone else been there? When this happens, I’m no longer the person, husband, dad, friend, and employee I want to be or could be.

We are never going to live in a world without stress. However, we can try to be more cognizant of stress, our current stress levels, and what we can do. Similar to the poison armor, I know I handle stress better when I’m routinely taking care of myself. Similar to the item that takes poison away, I know that getting outside, moving my body, and talking with someone helps clear stress out of my system. Similar to needing to find a poison free space in the game, sometimes I know that I just need to step back and away from everything.

The challenge: How will you recognize and deal with rising stress levels?

Bonus vulnerability moment- The short version is that the last few months have been hard in many aspects of life. Using our analogy, my poison/stress meter had been overflowing for some time, and I wasn’t who I wanted to be. I decided to leverage our Lyra benefit and talk to a therapist for the first time. During our initial conversation I said, “I’m surviving right now, but I want more than that. I deserve more than that. My family does too. I need tools or something to help me.” It’s only been a couple of sessions so far, but I’m so thankful I reached out. I share all of this to say that if you’re talking to someone, you’re not alone AND I’m proud of you for asking for help. If you’re thinking of talking to someone, you’re not alone, AND I’m proud of you for recognizing that you might benefit from help. It’s okay to want/need help sometimes. It’s part of being human.

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Stress Fractures and Taking Time to Heal (9-13-22)

Happy Tuesday,

Breaking the rule and sending my blog out on Tuesday. Our topic is taking time to heal.

Last week I mentioned that when the doctor diagnosed me with a stress fracture that he then shared a plan to help me get back to doing what I wanted to do. The first part of that plan was REST. He looked me in the eye and said, “If you continue training and doing what you’re currently doing, you are going to cause more damage. Damage that will be longer lasting. You need to rest. If you need crutches or something we can do that.” He then outlined what I could and couldn’t do for my health. Eventually he gave me a plan to ease into running. It felt weird resting. It felt like I was doing nothing. However, it was the best training move I made, and now I feel better than I have in a long time.

What does this have to do with anything? Think about work for a minute, how often do you give yourself time to recover? How often do you truly unplug and do what you need to heal from a day, a week, a month, a quarter, a year of running HARD? This rest is essential if we want to keep performing at a high level. Now I want you to think of the doctor. He came into this situation and did a few great things. He saw me and my pain. He took things off my plate (no impact on the leg). He offered resources (crutches). Even as I returned to running, he gave me clear parameters on what I should focus on and how long I should run in order to avoid reinjuring the leg. Now think of work. As a leader, are you doing what this doctor did? Are you acknowledging where your people are mentally/physically/socially? Are you seeing their struggle and pain? From there, are you putting a plan in place with clear priorities that removes things from their plate? Are you giving people the appropriate resources and support to do what they are being asked to do? We need these all these things, not only to do our jobs, but to give us the space, freedom, and opportunity to heal and recover.

The challenge: Are you taking the time to heal? If you are an official leader, are you creating the space/culture and are you putting in the support, so people have time to heal and recover?

Bonus: Even if you’re not a leader, as we work on projects, we could all do a better job of finding places and spaces where we can encourage folks to slow down and work at a more suitable pace vs. sprinting on fractured legs. I’m proud of myself, because I recently told a person, “Don’t do any more work. This will wait, and we will be fine with waiting even though it’s late.” I gave them permission and space to recover. I’m also disappointed in myself, because I’ve also ran colleagues into the ground lately with some projects that were overwhelming fires that consumed so much time at work and beyond.

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry