
This will be the end of our series focused on authentic selves. We started focused on the need to bring our authentic selves to work. From there we talked about creating a place that is safe enough for people to bring their authentic selves, and last week was about leveraging the different sides of people. This week is about the dark side of the moon, extending grace, having patience, and understanding that it’s okay that there are the sides of people you may not initially see.
Recently, Alice (2nd grade) had an assignment where she went recorded the phases of the moon. This got her excited, because she could see the moon change as it moved from a waxing crescent to a half moon to waning gibbous and eventually a new moon. The other interesting wrinkle in all of this was explaining to her that she only saw one side of the moon. Because of the way the moon revolves around the earth, there is a side of the moon that we never see. This side is often called the far side of the moon or the dark side of the moon (if you are a Pink Floyd fan). The reason you can’t see the other side of the moon is because of something called tidal locking where tidal forces from earth have slowed down the moon’s rotation to the point where the same side is always facing the earth (Wikipedia.org). Even though we may not have seen the other side of the moon, it is always there.
So what does this have to do with anything? This series has been about bringing your authentic selves to work. This isn’t easy. This isn’t natural for many people. In fact it’s harder for some people to bring their authentic selves than others for a wide variety of reasons. At first when people seem distant, it’s easy to say, “They need to try harder. They need to be more vulnerable.” However, maybe they are like the moon. We only see part of the moon because of tidal locking, something out of the moon’s control. In the same way, maybe the reason we only partially see some people at work is because of forces beyond their control. Maybe they were raised in a tough situation, where showing different sides of themselves was a sign of weakness. Maybe they are wired a different way, so they aren’t as comfortable bringing their authentic selves to work. Maybe they are stretched too thin in an impossible situation, where they can’t bring these different sides of themselves to fruition. Maybe they haven’t fully come to love who they are. Maybe they don’t feel safe enough to be who they are yet.
Instead of judging them or jumping to conclusions, we need to extend a little grace and have a little patience. With all people, my job is to love them and to be patient. My job is to love them, to build the environment where they can bring their authentic selves to work, and to wait because love works on their terms, not mine. And if I never see that other side of them, that’s okay, just as long as they know I care for them.
The challenge: How can you extend grace, patience, and love to other people as they look to bring their authentic selves to wherever they are?
Have a jolly good day,
Andrew Embry








