Bonus Blog- The Power of Kind Words

Bonus blog entry for the week about the power of kind words. In my blog last week I talked about how I didn’t feel I accomplished all the things I wanted to in January. If I’m being honest, life and work kicked my butt the entire month. It felt like I was juggling balls, all of them were glass, and I was letting quite a few of them fall and shatter. In the midst of feeling like an utter failure, one of my partners sent me this email.

“I could tell you have a lot going on for you this week, and it seems like you’ve been under a lot of stress. I just wanted to pop in to say that you’re doing a great job, and you’re easily one of my favorite clients to work with. You handle yourself so well and I value our partnership a lot. Keep being awesome and have a great weekend!”

What does this have to do with anything? Have you ever felt like you were a total failure? That’s where I was, and then I received that email. I can’t begin to tell you how much I needed that message, especially because this partner is one of the ones I felt I was failing the most. That short message changed the trajectory of my week and is carrying me into this week. This short email reminded me of two things. First, we are likely never as big of a failure as we feel like we are. Second, there is a lot of power in sharing an uplifting message with someone.

The challenge- Lift someone up today. Write them a short message showing them some love and appreciation. Create a positive ripple in the universe.

Bonus- If no one has told you lately, YOU’RE AWESOME! You are being so strong in the midst of all kinds of swirl, change, and challenges. YOU ARE ENOUGH and you are a gloriously beautiful messy human 😉

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Lies of P and Scoping out a Situation Before Taking Action (2-28-24)

Last week was about Lies of P and expecting difficulties. This week is about boss fights and the importance of understanding the situation before sprinting forward.

I had made it through the first few bosses without much trouble and then I ran into Fuoco, the King’s Flame. It was a giant incinerator like puppet (robot). I went all in and was super aggressive for my first attempt. It didn’t go well. He quickly killed me. After that, I switched up my approach. I started playing more cautiously and slowly for a few rounds. My kids saw this, thought it was weird, and asked why I wasn’t rushing in aggressively again to win. I explained to them that I wasn’t trying to win the fight right now. Right now, I was trying to better understand what I was up against. I was spending time learning his moves and finding his weak spots. I knew that after I had a better understanding of the fight, I would be able to be successful. Sure enough, when I finally went all in, I was able to get him down to about 10% of his health before he ever hit me the first time. My kids were amazed at how I was virtually flawless in the battle. (I’m virtually flawless in life too, so they shouldn’t have been surprised 😉)

What does this have to do with anything? In the above story, I quickly failed because I didn’t know what I was up against. If I would have kept charging in super aggressively then it would have taken me a long time before I was able to win that battle. I would have kept failing over and over again, because in my rush to move fast I would not have been learning the critical things about the boss fight to be successful. Investing time in approaching the situation more slowly, so I could understand it, ultimately enabled me to move faster toward success.

Now let’s look at the parallels with work. Have you ever had a project or assignment where you just went blindly barging in full steam ahead? How did that turn out for you? I’ve done that and it never works out particularly well. When I just rush in, I often fail to understand the true problem or miss important bits of information, and both lead to failure. Throughout my career, I’ve had to learn that the most important thing I can do for any project is understand what we are trying to accomplish, why, with whom, and how the deliverable is going to be used. I’ve learned that if I invest the time to slow down to understand those things, then I will be able to be faster and more successful in the future.

The challenge: Will you be willing to take your time to understand the situation before trying to charge forward?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Spider-Man: Miles Morales and Understanding the Other Side (3-3-21)

This is the last in our series about Spider-Man: Miles Morales. Last week was about setting the stage to welcome authenticity. This week is about trying to understand the other side before passing judgment. This contains some SPOILERS about the video game.

In most video games (or stories for that matter) there is a clear hero and a clear villain. My daughters know this, so when they played Spider-Man with me they assumed that whoever Spider-Man was trying to stop was obviously evil. In the game, there is an energy company called Roxxon and there is a character named The Tinkerer. Spider-Man fights the Tinkerer early in the game, so my daughters assumed they were evil was evil. As the game unfolds, you learn that Roxxon is doing some shady things and that The Tinkerer is leveraging some outside of the law means to try to stop them. When this is revealed Alice says, “Wait. So is the Tinkerer a good guy or a bad guy?” I replied with, “What do you think?” Alice responded by saying, “I don’t know. They are doing some things I wouldn’t do, but I also understand why they are doing it. This is tricky.”

What does this have to do with anything? Too often in life we assume that all situations are black and white. We see something that we wouldn’t necessarily do, declare it is wrong, and decide the “other” is bad. We don’t always take the time to understand their situation and where they are coming from. The fact is that it’s rarely ever so cut and dry. Trying to truly understand the other person is the first step to seeing the problem and ultimately finding a solution. We see this play out in politics, personal relationships, and even work. How often have you been part of a conversation where someone decided the other person was wrong, before ever trying to understand them? How often have you been that person who passed judgment without understanding?

Here is what makes listening to the other side even harder. It’s human instinct to want to be heard before we try to understand the other person. If we don’t feel like we are being heard, it’s too easy to close our mind to what the other side is saying. I know something I’m continuing to focus on is seeking first to understand before demanding to be understood, even if the other side isn’t originally listening to me.

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry