Tag: movingforward

Spider-Man: Miles Morales- Milestones and Unclear Paths (2-3-21)

This week we are going to kick off a series inspired by the video game Spider-man: Miles Morales.  We will focus on video games, milestones, and unclear paths.

In this game you play as Miles Morales as he embraces his role as Spider-man.  In case you aren’t familiar with Miles, he is biracial with a Black dad and a Puerto Rican mom. (You should also watch Into the Spider-verse).  He is new to his powers and just coming into his own as a superhero.  When you start the game you know that you’ll ultimately have to save the city, but you have no idea the path you will take to do this.  While you don’t have a clear path that shows exactly how you’ll beat the game, you do have milestones you need to reach.  For instance, a dot will show up on your map telling you to go there.  You go to that destination and learn about what is going on in the game.  After you complete that objective, you gain more insight into what the next step is.  You go to the next dot on your map and repeat the process.  As you complete the series of objectives you gain new powers and momentum that aid you in your quest.  By the time you get to the final battle you’ve achieved a series of short-term goals that have set you up for ultimate long-term success. 

What does this have to do with anything?  I’ve come to accept that dealing with ambiguity will be one of the few constants in life.  Things are more complex and changing faster than ever.  It’s impossible to always have step by step instructions on how to reach your goals.  This lack of clarity on a precise path forward makes it easy to freeze up and feel lost when facing a messy situation.  Have you ever felt this way?  In times like this, I think we have to take the video game approach.  Instead of being paralyzed because every step isn’t laid out in front of us, we need to be willing to look at the situation, identify a few milestones, and start moving in their direction even if we don’t have every other step perfectly laid out.  Similar to the Spider-man game, making progress on our first objective will give us the learning and momentum to better define and progress along a path toward our ultimate goal.  It just requires us to be brave enough to keep moving forward even if we can’t plan out every little step.

The challenge: When faced with ambiguity, how will you find a way to move forward? 

Bonus thought: Whenever I’m faced with an ambiguous situation I tend to ask myself these questions to try to bring clarity:

  • What do I believe the end goal is?  By the end of this, what should people think/feel/do?  Who can I bounce this thinking off of?
  • What is the from to for this?
  • What are 3 major milestones I’ll need to hit between now and the end goal to be on the path toward success?  I’ve found I can always identify 3 milestones.
  • What is an immediate step I can take right now to move things a little bit forward? This could be anything from scheduling time with someone to connect to pulling together rough thoughts to show someone.

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Setbacks and Moving Forward (9-30-20)

Last week was about supporting others.  This week is about setbacks and taking the next step forward. 

The end of July is when my wife first had stomach pains.  She went to the hospital and spent about 3 days there.  She was diagnosed with chronic pancreatitis (setback), which was weird because she never had issues before.  Then she came home.  A few days later she was in pain again and went back to the hospital (setback).  At the hospital we found out she would require intense surgery that is typically used on patients with pancreatic cancer (setback).  Surgery went well!  She was told she’d be in the hospital for about 4 days and then would go home.  She was there for about 10 days (setback). 

She came home, and we were all so thankful and excited.  She was home for about 3 days before she went back to the hospital (setback).  She went into the hospital thinking it would be a couple of days, but it turned out to be another week or so (setback).  While in the hospital this time they attempted to put in a feeding tube because she couldn’t hold down food.  The feeding tube came out (setback).  The next day they tried the feeding tube again (setback).  The third day they tried placing the feeding tube with a scope.  It was in for about an hour before it was coiled in the back of her throat and had to be removed (setback).  Finally, they decided she would need a PIC line so she could get nutrition. 

They put in the line and then sent her home on August 31st.  The first night she’s home she gets sick all throughout the night (setback).  I sleep downstairs on the couch, so I can help her.  Over the next few days she continues to get sick (setbacks).  Finally, one day she keeps food down.  She starts to do a little better.  After 2 weeks she’s about 60%.  She finally gets off the PIC line.  She’s making progress.  Now she has some days that are better than others.  Sometimes the tiredness comes, another reminder she’s not there yet, another small setback.

Throughout all of the above, I continued to have ups and downs with work and with other stuff going on in life.  Often all these setbacks were overwhelming and led to fear and tears.  My wife and I would talk and we’d both be worried about whether or not we could handle this.  Everything felt too big, too overwhelming.  Finally, we realized that the only thing that matters is taking the next step forward.  It’s not about having some grandiose victory where we conquer something.  It’s about getting knocked back again and again and again, and making the decision to keep trying to move forward after every setback.  That’s what we are focused on now as we continue to recover and get back to normal.  We know there will be bad days, and we know that we will keep moving forward, no matter how small those steps are.

What does this have to do with anything?  I’m sure if we ever talked you could tell me a similar story to the one described above.  It might be about work.  It might be about health.  It might be about relationships.  It would be the same story of getting knocked back again and again and again, and you moving forward again and again and again.  It’s not an easy story.  It’s not a pretty story.  However, it is a powerful story that reminds us what we can overcome if we focus on finding ways to move forward.  No matter what you might be facing, I pray you have the strength to keep moving forward.

The challenge: Will you keep moving forward?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry