Flowers, Carbon Dioxide, and Adversity (9-9-20)

This is the last in the series of lessons we can learn about flowers. We started with the need to stop and zoom in to see the flowers. From there, we talked about understand if you need heat or shade to grow, and last week was about transplant shock and taking care of ourselves in difficult times. This week is about flowers, carbon dioxide, and adversity.

If you ever found yourself in a room filled with carbon dioxide it wouldn’t be good for you. Slowly it would begin to poison your systems, because our bodies need oxygen and give off carbon dioxide. However, if we put a flower in a room filled with carbon dioxide it would be good for them. Their cellular system would take that carbon dioxide and mix it with sunlight and water to go through photosynthesis. As a result the flower would grow.

You might be wondering where this is going. It’s interesting that carbon dioxide can have two entirely different impacts, based on the makeup of humans and flowers. For one group carbon dioxide is harmful and for the other group it is helpful. In a similar way, adversity can either be harmful or can lead to growth based on the makeup of the individual and their mindset during the situation.

We all face adversity, but we don’t all respond to adversity the same. Throughout this entire year I have continued to challenge myself to find ways to grow from the obstacles that have come. Sometimes, I can’t find a way to grow. Sometimes, the situation just straight up sucks, and there is no real lesson to take from it. This is okay. Other times, there are challenges I can learn from. These challenges can be great teachers, if I’m willing to approach them with an open mind.

The challenge: What have you learned from some of the challenges you’ve faced this year?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Being Intentional about Watering Plants (8-26-20)

Last week was about knowing what you need to grow and develop. This week is about being intentional about watering plants and giving love, care, and recognition to people.

My wife has flowers planted everywhere outside of our house. Every day she would spend a few minutes checking on the plants to ensure they were getting enough water. Sometimes the plants were fine, because it had been raining, so they were receiving all the nourishment they needed. Sometimes, the plants were a little dry and she’d water them that night to take care of them. Either way, she always checked in on them to see what they needed. This pattern has been disrupted lately. My wife has been in the hospital for the past 3 weeks with surgery and recovery. With all this going on, I haven’t been doing the best job of checking on the plants, so they aren’t doing as well as they should be doing. Now you could say I’m busy with other things right now, which is true. The other truth is that the plants are starting to not do so well, and I need to take care of them.

Where is this going? Plants need water to grow, and a parallel to this is that people need care, love, and recognition to feel seen. Like plants, people won’t always tell you when they need a little nourishment. It’s up to us to check in on them and give them nourishment. My wife was great about checking on the plants, and I wasn’t, so they began to die. In a similar way, if we don’t check on each other and give what is needed, people become disengaged and start to wither. When it comes to people, I always make the assumption that people need a little extra care, love, and recognition, so I try to give them a little bit of this in every interaction. Assuming they need this is the safest bet, because it guarantees there is no way to lose. If the person is already feeling awesome about themselves and I give them an extra word of encouragement, they gain an extra boost in their step. If the person is having a tough time, then my words of encouragement can be the water they desperately need.

Now you could say it’s difficult to give people the care, love, recognition, and support they need. This is true. You could also say, it’s easy not to do those things because you are so busy. This is also true. The other truth is that if it is your team, you are responsible for helping your team grow. If you don’t give them the support they need, they will wither until you begin taking care of them again.

The challenge: How intentional are you about ensuring your team gets the “water” they need?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Sun, Shade, and What We Need to Grow (8-19-20)

Last week was about stopping to admire the flowers. This week is about sun, shade, and what we need to grow.

Recently my aunt bought some potted plants for my girls to plant at our house. As soon as we received them I asked, “Are these plants that require a lot of sun or a lot of shade?” Both of them happened to be plants to require sun. This simple question was important because of where my house is in the subdivision relative to the sun. We have some plants in areas that have intense heat for most of the day, some plants that get both sun and shade, and other plants that primarily get shade. We need to put the plants in the right spot, so they will get what they need to thrive and grow. If you put a shade plant in a place filled with hot sun it shrivels and vice versa.

Your probably see where this is going. There are two main connections we can make. The first connection is with regards to figuring out what we each individually need. Deep inside plants “know” what they need to thrive and survive. Do you? What does your ideal environment look like? Where do you need to get those things from? I know for me to thrive and grow I need work that is challenging, a chance to make impact, the ability to touch a lot of stuff, folks who are good people that care about each other, and a space where I can be my weird self. (Having the space to be me is important, because weirdness is my natural state of being 😉) When I have those things I grow and when I don’t have those things I either grow more slowly or shrivel a bit. As a result, when I think about what roles to apply for and teams I want to join I look for those things. Throughout my career there have been jobs I’ve decided not to apply for, because I knew I couldn’t get the things I needed. It didn’t make the roles bad, they just weren’t where I was going to grow. Maybe someone else needed those vibes, and that’s okay. The second connection is about building the environment other folks can flourish in. Not everyone is going to be exactly like you. As a leader, do you know what kind of environment your team needs? Are you actively building and monitoring that environment? This is a delicate balance, because there are things that everyone needs and there are also opportunities to add in the small extra touches that impact some individuals more than others.

The challenge: Are you planting yourself in the right spot? How are you building the best environment for the people around you?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Dusting Off Shelves and Skills (9-6-17)

Last week was about taking out the trash and letting go. This week we will reflect on dusting, and taking the time to brush off your skills (and your shoulders if you are Jay-Z). By the way, this week is dedicated to Hannah Short, because she is the one who said we need to do something on dusting.

You may not know this about me, but I’m a cleaner. I’m not obsessive about cleaning, but I do enjoy keeping everything relatively clean, which means I am definitely someone who dusts. I dust in order to keep things clean, tidy, and functioning. Not only do I dust, but where I come from, there are two kinds of dusting (#dustingsnob). There is feather dusting, which is a relatively quick exercise, where you use the feather dusting to brush off things where they are. It takes minimal time and effort, and is best suited as something that is done between serious cleaning. Feather dusting keeps things from getting too dirty. Then, there is real dusting where you bust out some pledge, take EVERYTHING off the shelves, and go after dust bunnies like you were a fox. This is more labor intensive, but it also helps you achieve a deeper clean and isn’t that what everyone wants in life? It’s not that one kind of dusting is necessarily better than the other, but each one has different purposes and uses.

So what does this have to do with work? It’s really easy to avoid dusting. Then, all of a sudden when you do look at stuff you realize there are dust bunnies, gunk, and grime covering everything and messing stuff up. I feel the same can be said about work. It’s really easy to get so lost in the day to day stuff that we ignore the dirt and grime that find a way to bog down our skills and capabilities. When we ignore dusting, we ignore ourselves, and we take away our chance to get better. Seriously, how often do you stop and take a few moments to think about you and brushing off your skills? Just like at home, I feel that there are a couple of different ways of dusting things off at work. You can feather dust, which to me is taking a few minutes to stop and reflect on something you’ve recently experienced, read, watched, etc. You can also roll up your sleeves and do some deep cleaning, whether that is going to workshops, deep diving with a trusted mentor/coach/colleague, or some other activity that requires you to go to a deeper level.

The challenge: Are you taking the time to dust? Do you have a specific skill or competency you want to dust off?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Ironing, the Need for Heat, and Development (8-23-17)

This week I’d like to kick off a new series on lessons learned from doing things around the house. Sounds thrilling, right? This series is either going to be horrible or it will bring the heat. Speaking of bringing the heat, let’s kick this off by thinking about ironing and development. (In case you’re wondering, I’m always this smooth with my bad jokes).

About once a month I iron all my dress shirts, polos, dress pants, and anything else that needs to be ironed. Recently, I finished ironing a bunch of clothes, and had to take them upstairs so I momentarily unplugged the iron and took the shirts up to my closet. When I came back, I started using the iron and quickly realized it wasn’t working. At first I was confused, and then realized I never plugged the iron back in. No electricity meant no heat, which meant the iron couldn’t do its job. It was at this point I had a minor epiphany about how ironing is always a delicate balance. You need to have heat to smooth out wrinkles, but not too much heat or you’ll burn the garment.

You might be wondering what this has to do with work. Well, I think we could all use a little ironing sometimes. We could all use something to help us smooth out our wrinkles and make us a little sharper, a little better. Much like the iron, I think we need heat to do this. In this case, heat could be a challenge, positive tension, coaching, a difficult conversation, making mistakes, failing, etc. If you don’t have those things, you never have what you need to grow. The trick is to find the balance in the heat. Too little challenge/positive tension/coaching/mistakes and nothing gets smoothed out. Too much, and you get burned out, damaged, and worse off than you were before. It’s up to us to find the heat in our jobs that helps us go to the next level.

Embry example-> When I talk to people about what kind of work I like I say, “I like messy and muddy problems.” I don’t like those things because they are easy. I like those things because they force me to grow and smooth out some of my rough spots, and I know I have more than my fair share of rough spots. Over the past few months I’ve had a lot of things I’ve worked on for the first time. Whether it was running market research, learning about marketing processes, or adapting to a new team, I wasn’t immediately great at any of those things. In fact a week or two ago, I turned to a teammate and said something like, “These past few days have been a friendly reminder that I’m not great at my job yet and that I have a lot of room to grow.” It’s not that I think I’m an incompetent mess, well maybe I am depending on the day 😉 It’s just that I realize I can still be so much better. Over the past few months I’ve experienced some heat and as a result I’ve smoothed out some of my wrinkles and grown. I believe the Andrew Embry of today could run circles around the Andrew Embry of 7 months ago. My hope is that in a year that Andrew Embry will be so awesome that he will be running circles around my current self while doing backflips and yo-yo tricks.

The challenge: Are embracing the heat to iron out your wrinkles? How can you be a good iron for others to help them get the wrinkles out?

Bonus challenge: Think of someone who has grown in the past few months and give them a shout out and let them know you see their progress.

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Fixed vs. Growth Mindset and Parenting (1-18-17)

Last week was about mindsets and confidence. This week we will explore having a fixed vs. a growth mindset. The inspiration comes the work Carol Dweck has done in this space. Click HERE for Carol’s TED talk on the subject.

Carol’s premise is that you can either have a fixed mindset or a growth mindset. If you have a fixed mindset you believe that things like talent and intelligence are pre-determined, and you will tend to avoid challenges, because failure is something you can’t do anything about since your skills are fixed. If you have a growth mindset you realize that you have a baseline of talent and intelligence, but you know these can be enhanced. If you have this mindset you view failure as an opportunity to learn and improve.

Connection to parenting-> My wife and I are trying to raise kids with a growth mindset. You’d assume that all we would need to do is praise our girls and tell them they can do anything. This is only a small part. The big part is celebrating the grind with them and what the grind has enabled them to do. For example, my youngest, Violet, will turn 3 over the weekend. She is behind with her speech. As Violet makes progress we praise her for that, and we also say, “I’m so proud of how hard you’ve been working on your words. Good job working on your flashcards. You’re hard work is helping you do better.” We don’t always do it, but we are trying to be intentional about celebrating the grind and how that leads to the result. We believe that if we continually do this we will foster a growth mindset, a mindset in which our girls will grow up and say, “I can’t do that yet, BUT I will figure out how!” Take that growth mindset and add in some grit and some sass, and you’ll have two strong Embry ladies ready to take on the world.

Work connection. I see two different ways this can connect with work. The first connection is to your personal mindset. Do you have a fixed or a growth mindset? Be honest. Here is where I’m supposed to tell you that I’m some wise sage who always believes in myself and always has this sunny outlook that I can grind it out and improve. I’d be lying if I said that. I have times where I’m like, “Forget it. I can’t do that garbage!” (That’s my maturity right there). The second connection is what are you doing to create a growth mindset for others around you? What are you saying and/or doing to get others to see their potential for growth? Are you praising them for going through the process like you praise them for the result? Are you helping them see how they messiness and pain they are going through now is making them better? If you can connect those dots for people they will be more likely to embrace a growth mindset. They will be more likely to say, “I can’t do that yet, BUT I will figure out how.”

The challenge: What are you doing to create a growth mindset for yourself and the others around you?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

California Redwood Trees, Growth, and Reflection (10-5-16)

This will be the final post in the series on growth and development. We started with using doubt as a dowsing rod to show us where we need to go to grow. Then, we talked about failure and lifting weights and how you can’t play it safe if you want to grow. We touched on the fact that we aren’t butterflies safe in a cocoon in a the midst of a crazy world, and last week we talked about how you have to go through your own internal photosynthesis in order to develop. We are going to end this series by moving from flowers to trees and the importance of reflecting on our progress.

California Redwood trees are known for their immense size and beauty. Even though they are some of the largest trees in the world they all started as a small seed. Slowly, that seed grew and sprouted into a young sapling. The sapling then spent years going through photosynthesis, growing and developing, until it became the Redwood trees people plan trips to go see.

I sometimes wonder if a tree can feel itself growing. At some kind of cellular level I wonder if the tree can sense where it is growing, that its limbs are getting longer, and that its roots are digging deeper into the ground. It would be pretty cool if it could.

How does this connect with our work? Much like the tree we have all grown a lot over the years. Do you ever stop to reflect on how much and how you’ve grown? Do you ever stop to celebrate how much you’ve changed? Over the past few years I’ve picked up skills I didn’t have, sharpened strengths that already existed, and learned so much more about work and life. At the same time as I’ve worked with people I’ve watched them grow too! I’ve seen people begin to grow into the leaders they always thought they could be. I’ve seen people take on new challenges and win. I’ve watched people unleash the potential that’s been inside of them for years.

The challenge: Take a second to appreciate how far you’ve come. Take a second to help someone else understand how much they’ve grown and how proud of them you are. Before you do anything else today take a second and send someone a kind word telling them that you’ve noticed their growth. It will make their week and yours too. I’m serious. Stop reading this email and send some kind words to somebody. Tell them, “Hey, just want you to know that I appreciate you. You used to be _______, but now you’re like ______. I couldn’t be prouder of how far you’ve come. Keep growing.”

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Growth, Development, and Photosynthesis (9-28-16)

Last week we looked at butterflies, so this week let’s look at flowers, growth, and photosynthesis. Someone call Justin Timberlake, because I’m bringing sexy back. Wait. Did I say sexy? I meant nerdy. Definitely meant nerdy. Get ready for some bodacious botany and funky flowers.

A flower doesn’t blossom by luck. In order for a flower to blossom and grow it must undergo photosynthesis. For photosynthesis to happen flowers need things like soil, water, carbon dioxide, and of course sunlight, which is the catalyst for the reaction. During photosynthesis, the flower takes in sunlight, which starts a reaction that results in the flower producing sugar that becomes energy to feed its transformation. Essentially, the flower absorbs the things from its surroundings in order to go through an INTERNAL process to change. The flower can only develop and grow if it goes through this INTERNAL process.

What does photosynthesis have to do with our development? Think about how we develop ourselves. We can learn things from our day to day work and we can also do external things like read books, view TED talks, take courses, attend leadership conferences, etc. If you think of the flower metaphor these developmental opportunities are like water, soil, and carbon dioxide. They give us the potential to develop, but they do NOT guarantee growth. In order to grow we need sunlight to go through our own photosynthesis. I’d argue that our sunlight is time and our photosynthesis is reflection. We need to be deliberate to set aside dedicated time to really reflect on what we have experienced, so we can go through our own INTERNAL process and transform everything we have soaked up into energy to power our growth.

Every day we are exposed to the key components that could lead to tremendous growth. In a world that is extremely busy, it’s too easy to miss these chances. It’s too easy to rely on something external to make us grow. The fact is that growth comes inside from all of us.

The challenge: Are you taking the time to go through your own version of photosynthesis so you can grow?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

We are NOT Butterflies (9-21-16)

Last week we looked at how being safe prevents us from growing. This week I want us to look at growth and how we are NOT exactly like butterflies.

When you think about growth, development, and transformation you might think about caterpillars becoming butterflies. This is a metaphor that has been used over and over again in books, articles, and speeches about development and self-improvement. The symbolism is straight forward. A caterpillar enters its cocoon and then emerges, transformed into a beautiful butterfly.

It’s an interesting analogy, because it is a beautiful symbol of rebirth. At the same time, there are a three of things that make us very different from butterflies. First, caterpillars have to turn into butterflies as they grow. It’s in their DNA. Second, caterpillars have cocoons that separate and protect them from the outside world during their transformations. Finally, caterpillars only transform once, and we never stop transforming.

What does this have to do with us? Caterpillars don’t have a choice in what they become, but WE do. We have the ability to choose who we become and how we grow as people. We can choose which of our skills we want to work on sharpening and what we need to do to be the best versions of ourselves. As we think about the future, it is up to us to figure out what skills we will need and find ways to gather and enhance those skills. The other difference is that we don’t have cocoons. We don’t have something to sequester us from the world as we stumble and grow. We grow in the midst of a swirling and dynamic environment, and as we grow we expose a part of our weakness for others to see. It takes strength to be vulnerable like this. This is part of being human. The final difference is that unlike caterpillars we should never stop transforming. We are always learning new things and adapting. If you’re not adapting, you’re not growing.

The challenges: Do you know where and how you want to grow? Do you give others encouragement and show them understanding as they grow in the midst of a crazy world? Are you doing the right things to make sure you are always growing?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Growing vs. Being Safe (9-14-16)

Last week we talked about lifting weights, failure, and how that leads to growth. This week I want us to think about how being safe prevents us from growing. As many of you know, I have two daughters Alice (4) and Violet (2). As their dad I have an urge to keep them safe. I have a strong desire to protect them from all harm. However, this is NOT my job. My job is NOT to keep them safe. My job is to keep them from seriously injuring themselves. The picture is of the inside diving board my girls made. Not exactly safe, but it won’t kill them either 😉

You might think that keeping them safe and keeping them from seriously injuring themselves is the same thing, but it’s NOT. Keeping them safe implies protecting them from ALL discomfort, while ensuring they don’t seriously injure themselves implies that I understand they are going to do things that result in bruises, cuts, pain, and discomfort. Keeping them safe requires I build a bubble around them. Sure the bubble will protect them, but it will also suffocate them. The bubble will keep them from growing. Keeping them from seriously injuring themselves implies that they will have room to run, and I’ll build a fence to keep them from going off the cliff. Sure, they’ll end up getting bumps and bruises, maybe even a broken bone, but they’ll grow a lot in the process.

What does this have to do with work? As individuals are we trying to stay safe or are we trying to avoid severe harm? If we play it safe we can’t ever grow, because we will always be trapped and limited by the bubbles we live in. As leaders, are we keeping people safe or are we encouraging them to go make leaps, get messy, and get some bruises in the process?

Embry experience. In a previous role I was trying to get people aligned on a project. I had a meeting with the key stakeholders and I knew it was going to be rough. My boss said she was going to attend the meeting. The morning of the meeting my boss asked me how I felt, and I said, “I got this.” The meeting was controlled chaos with disagreements and herding cats. I left bumped, bruised, and cut a little bit. Here’s the thing. My boss never came to the meeting. When she saw me later that day she asked how it went. I told her that it was a little rough, but I held my own and knew it would be like that going in. Then she winked and said, “You know, I didn’t come to that on purpose, right? I knew you’d figure out how to handle it.” I just chuckled and said, “Yeah, I know.” Fast forward a few weeks. It’s another big meeting with key stakeholders. This time my boss is there. Once again there is some tension and I’m getting tossed around a bit and beat up. My boss could have jumped in to save the day, but she didn’t. I manage to finesse everything and get us aligned on a decision. After the meeting I’m obviously a little beat up, but I’m filled with pride at what I’d accomplished. This was my favorite moment with that boss. Why? It’s because that moment forced me to prove that I could handle those tricky situations. My boss could have jumped in and kept me safe, but instead she let me get beat up a bit. Because of this, I grew a lot that day.

The challenge: Are you playing it safe or are you getting bumped and bruised, so you can grow? Are you keeping others safe or you allowing them to get bumped and bruised so they can grow?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry