Decoder Rings and Communication (4-15-15)

Last week we finished thoughts on self-reflection, and this week we are going to look at decoding messages.  When I was younger I remember opening cereal boxes and getting cool toys.  One toy was the decoder ring.  You used this to crack a code that was somewhere on the cereal box.  Each number corresponded to a letter, and once you set up the ring it was easy to decode the message to see what it really said.

Sometimes I wish I had a decoder ring at work.  At this point I’m sure you’re probably smiling or chuckling while saying, “Yeah, we could use that decoder ring to translate all of these crazy corporate acronyms.”  That’s true.  However, I would want to use the decoder ring on the buzzword phrases we use to help us understand what we actually mean.  For example, we could use it on phrases like, “We need to be more creative,” “We need to put the customer at the center of all we do,” “We need to make faster decisions,” etc.  We say these things, but do we really understand what we are saying?

When people say they want creativity, what they usually mean is that they want the output of creativity without any of the messiness.  In actuality, when you say you want creativity, what you are really saying is that you want change.  You want to disrupt the normal way of doing things.  You are saying that you are okay with ideas that are muddy for a while until they are finally polished and revealed to be worth something.  You want to do things that make people at least a little bit uncomfortable.  That is what you are saying when you say you want creativity.  If you don’t want those things, then you don’t want creativity.

Similarly, if you say you want to make faster decisions, what you are actually saying is that you are okay with taking on more risk.  You are okay with making mistakes.  It means that you are willing to give folks more power, which comes with responsibility and accountability.  It means that you are willing to invest the time, effort, and resources to ensure the right people are capable of making the right decisions.  If you don’t want those things, then you don’t want to make faster decisions.

Decode what you’re saying and ask yourself if that’s what you really want.

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Holding up a Mirror (4-8-15)

Last week was about sharing your reflection.  This week is about holding up a mirror to help people reflect. Overall, it’s a story about a mistake I made and how someone coached me to think about why I do what I do.

Imagine that we are working together and I’m doing pretty good work.  Then, one day I send you something and say, “This is rough, but give me your thoughts.”  You quickly see that it is complete garbage.  You ask yourself, “How could he be so far off?  I’ve never seen him do stuff that is so bad.”  You give me a suggestion to go in another direction.  Then I come back to you with something that’s really good.  You’re left wondering, “Why did he go from sending me crap to sending me something really good?  How does he miss so badly and then turn around and get it right?”

Fast forward.  I’m sitting down with a co-worker and asking for some feedback.  She highlights a few good things and then tells me the above story.  Her fear is that I might do this with other folks, and they’ll be left asking themselves the same questions.  A lesser coach would have just pointed it out and told me to fix it.  Instead, she holds up a mirror to me and says, “Can you help me understand why you do this?”

I think and realize that I’m not communicating my intent well.  What is happening in these situations is that I’m trying to figure out which of two problems I need to address.  Problem 1 is that it is a good idea, but I’m having problems executing it.  Problem 2 is that the idea isn’t good, so I need to change course altogether.  The way I move forward really depends on what the problem is.  Our email exchange told me I was dealing with Problem 2, so I switched to a different idea and that’s why the work was better.  Now she knows my thought process and why I did what I did.  She says that this makes sense, but without this rationale it just looks like I missed the boat by a mile and half.

Here’s the thing.  I’ve made this mistake before.  I’ve made it with peers and higher up folks including VPs.  If she would have just pointed this out and told me to fix it, then nothing would have changed.  I would have fixed it once, but probably made the same mistake over and over again.  However, since she asked the question and held the mirror up to help me reflect, I am more cognizant of what I’m doing, why I’m doing it, and how I can be better in the future.

Are you holding up a mirror to help others reflect or are you just pointing everything out?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Sharing your Reflection (4-1-15)

I don’t meant to brag, but I’m at least a 9.5 on a scale from 1 to 10 when it comes to attractiveness, because of my beard, beautiful hair, and a physique so chiseled people call me David (sculpture reference, what?)  Luckily, I don’t really think of myself that way.  As we’ve been talking about reflecting, it’s also important to take the time to share the way you see yourself with others to make sure that other people see a lion and not a kitten like the photo on the right.

Recently I set up time and talked to someone about how I’m perceived.  We talked about strengths (my beard, which is the only thing we could come up with) and my improvement areas (knowing when to flex my style and pull back a little bit, coming across as brash/obnoxious/silly, etc.)  After I shared I shut my mouth, listened, and only asked questions to better understand her perspective. I learned some important nuggets that day from her.

When it came to my strengths, she agreed with what I shared, but she also talked to me about other things I do well that I just took for granted.  She helped me see how these are unique things I can leverage in the future.  Without her help, I wouldn’t have realized that other people were seeing these things in me and how important those things I are for my current and future success.

When it came to areas of improvement, she told me that she found me annoying when we first worked together because we clashed, there was bad communication, and we were put in a difficult situation.  I almost hugged her.  Yes, you read that right.  I wanted to hug her, because she cared enough about me to be that honest.  By the way, I agree and totally saw how I came across that way.  Anyway, she also told me about something I do that I wasn’t aware of.  Sometimes when I’m working with folks and I have an idea or a question that’s a little different I’ll preface things with, “Weird comment/question for you…”  The people who know me laugh, and chime in with something like, “Big surprise.”  However, she explained that the people who don’t know me could take this as me apologizing for being different.  It gives them an opportunity to hold the uniqueness against me.  Instead of making the joke, I could just go in with, “I’m looking at this from a different perspective.  Here’s my thought…”  I walked away from that conversation after learning a few more things about myself and reaffirming that there is another person who cares enough about me to be really honest.  You can imagine how much more I think of her now.

Anyway, since I’ve shared a bit of my reflection consider this an open invitation.  If you ever have feedback for me you think I should know, send it my way.  On the flip side, if you ever want to share your reflection with someone and gather feedback, I’ll be happy to do that too.

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Yoga, Success, and Balance (3-25-15)

This week is also about self-reflection, but is more focused on maintaining success.  This week’s blog is inspired by a colleague, her love of yoga, and some conversations we have had.

The reason I said maintaining success in the above paragraph is that anyone can achieve success once in a while.  The key is to maintain a level of success.  One thing that gets in the way of this is that people often talk about success like it is a final destination.  We talk about success and reaching the next level.  We talk about it like one day we will finish climbing a mountain or achieve something and shout to the stars, “I have arrived!”  Then, since we are in the land of success we will stroll in a lush valley and life will remain like this forever.  The problem is that it doesn’t work like that.  We don’t maintain success by just arriving.

Actually, maintaining success is like doing yoga.  Have you ever done yoga?  I’m not going to lie.  When I first started seeing people do that stuff, I thought, “How hard can doing stretches be?  Look at those people just standing still in tree pose or whatever.  That’s can’t be hard.”  And then I tried it and now I consider surviving the workout a major accomplishment.  I soon discovered that when you do a yoga pose you are not standing still.  You are not stagnant.  Instead, your body is constantly recalibrating in both large and small ways.  I understand that being good at yoga requires a combination of strength, flexibility, and control.  The result of exercising strength, flexibility, and control is balance.  Balance is not a stagnant state of being.  Balance is a state of constant movement and change.  Likewise, maintaining success is not a stagnant state of being.  Maintaining success is about consistently making adjustments.

Take a look in the mirror.  Are you consistently making those adjustments?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Aladdin, a Magic Carpet, and Empowerment (2-18-15)

Last week we talked about real love and showing love to the people you work with.  This week I want to look at another love story and its link to empowerment.  In Disney’s Aladdin there are two scenes where Aladdin turns to Jasmine and asks, “Do you trust me?”    What Aladdin is really asking is, “Do you trust me enough to make decisions that will solve our problem?”  In both instances she takes his hand and then they either start escaping guards or go on a magic carpet ride.  What Jasmine is actually telling him when she takes his hand is that she trusts him to make certain decisions.  This is a weird way of saying that trust is the basis of empowerment.

For the past few months it feels like everyone is talking about empowerment, making faster decisions, and decision rights.  We talk about how we need to stop micromanaging people and empower employees.  What I don’t hear anyone directly talking about is empowerment and its link to trust.  I feel that the only way you can truly empower someone is to help them understand what decisions you trust them to make and then show that you trust them to make those decisions.

This sounds so simple, but it’s not easy.  I feel that a lack of empowerment stems from two issues that both go back to trust or a lack of trust.  Issue 1 is that you told someone that you trust them to make a decision, but you don’t really mean it.  Someone says, “You own X.”  Then you start doing X.  Out of nowhere the person comes back and tells you how to do X and makes you dramatically change what you were doing.  They do this, because they already knew how they wanted it done and whether they say it or not, they don’t trust you to do it any other way but their own.  (Please tell me I’m not the only one this has ever happened to.  Also, confession, I know that I’ve done this to other people.  I don’t do it intentionally, but I know I’ve done it.)

Issue 2 is that you legitimately trust the person to make the decision, but they aren’t sure if you really trust them to make those calls.  The reason Issue 2 is a problem is because the person keeps coming back to get your approval and wasting time when you have faith that they can do the job.  Most of the time, we put the burden on the employee when this happens.  We say that they need to step up and make decisions.  What we often fail to think about is that they are probably a little gun shy, because Issue 1 is so prevalent.  Also, people don’t like to say this, but when Issue 2 happens it is often the leader’s fault for not ensuring that the other person understand how much they trust them.

Are you really giving your trust to people when you empower them?  Are you doing everything you can to ensure they understand how much you trust them and what you trust them to do when you empower them?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Real Love and the Road Runner (2-11-15)

Valentine’s Day is just around the corner and we have been bombarded with advertisements for date nights and jewelry.  It’s only fitting that this blog is about love. (I know this is work, but we’re still allowed to talk about the “L” word, right?)

If you ask my mom, she’ll tell you that she knew I was going to marry my wife before I did.  If you ask her why, she won’t give you some sappy story about a twinkle in my eye, my heart fluttering, or any of that superficial stuff.  She’ll tell you it’s because she could tell right away that Diane would challenge me and make me better.  (My mom would also say that she knew Diane would be ready to knock me down a few pegs when I was being an idiot, but we don’t need to go there or talk about how many times that has happened.)

Real love isn’t about fairy tale happy endings and always being happy.  Real love isn’t about always agreeing and getting along.  Real love isn’t about the words you say, but is instead about your everyday actions.  Real love is about caring enough for a person that you are there for them to help them be the best they can be.

What does this have to do with work?  Well, what are you doing to show the people you work with that you love and care about them?  A few weeks ago, I send an email to Bob (fictitious name) and said, “I’m trying to accomplish X, and I need you to send me slides 1, 2, and 3 for a presentation I’m putting together.”  Do you know what Bob does?  Bob gets back to me and asks me a few more questions about what I mean when I say I want to accomplish X.  Then he tells me, “I know you asked for slides 1, 2, and 3, but they won’t get you to X.  You don’t really want those, but I’ll get you what you need to get to X.”  He was right and got me the info I actually needed to help me have success.  He cared enough about me to challenge me and make me better.  He does this all the time, so as you can imagine, he’s one of my favorite people to work with.

Be Bob and show some love to the people you work with.

Bonus: A few years ago when I was on a National Poetry Slam team my teammates did a poem about Roadrunner and Wile E. Coyote, one of the best love stories ever told.  If you want something a little different, check it out.  http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xa7oni_ali-muldrow-et-evy-gildrie-voyles-n_webcam

Peace and love,

Andrew Embry

The Year of the Ripple and Marty McFly (1-28-15)

We’ve been talking about goals.  We’ve talked about changing the way we think about goals (strong dragons and getting your shine on).  We’ve also talked about setting goals that inspire us (beast mode beautiful story).  We are going to tie this all together with time travel movies.

You’ve probably heard a lot more people than normal discussing Back to the Future 2.  The reason they are doing this is because in the film Marty went to the year 2015, and people are upset that we have yet to realize the vision of hover boards for everyone.  This movie, like any other movie involving time travel, is actually about causing ripples.  Just like any other time travel movie, someone goes back in time and does something seemingly small, which is later revealed to have a giant impact.

Now let’s connect the ripples to real life.  Alice made a small decision that she is a strong dragon.  This right mindset helped her achieve the goal.  A colleague made a small decision to share his light by writing thank you notes, which increased engagement for people.  I decide to focus on trying to live in a constant state of beast mode vs. just dropping pounds, which changes the way I think about and do things.

If we make these small decisions and do these things, we set off a chain reaction.  We start a series of ripples and if you watch the ripples long enough you’ll see something beautiful.  All of a sudden, you’ll see the colleagues, customers, and ultimately patients who are changed by your small choices.  The impact and size of your ripples are only limited by how big you want to dream and how much work you want to put in to make those dreams a reality.

Here’s to the power of the decisions and ripples we make.

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Do your goals motivate you? (1-21-15)

I hope that you’ve been getting your shine on since last week.  This week we’ll continue to talk about goals and ask ourselves what appears to be a dumb question.  Do the goals you set motivate you?  I ask, because I’m often guilty of setting goals that don’t really motivate me, and I’d bet you do to.

Let’s look at a goal that many of us have when we start a new year, losing weight.  This is going to sound stupid, but I don’t’ really know what the numbers on the scale mean.  Obviously I’m overweight, and need to lose weight.  However, I can’t tell you if losing 15 pounds would make me feel any better or worse compared to losing 10 pounds.  The number doesn’t do anything for me.

This is about finding the goal, the dream that motivates you.  I want to feel stronger than I do right now.  I want to go through each day feeling like I’m constantly in beast mode/the zone/the flow or whatever you want to call that feeling.  That’s the thing that motivates me, so that’s what I’m going to shoot for.  I know in order to have this feeling on a consistent basis I need to take better care of myself.  I might use weight, waist size, etc. to track progress, but my goal is to consistently be in those flow moments.

Now let’s apply this to work.  It’s all about finding your thing.  What gets me going is not the same thing that gets you going, and that’s fine.  What goal motivates you?  In the course of this year I will have projects and things that I work on and will be measured against, but those are just a means to an end for me.  Here’s my dream for this role.  I want to weave a beautiful story that moves people and connects everything together in a meaningful way for them.  I want people to walk away with a greater sense of purpose, hope, engagement, and dedication as a result of some of the work I do and because of who I am.  I want them to take this greater sense of hope, purpose, and engagement and impact patients.  Now, I’m not sure how I work that into a myPM document, but if I could come close to that I would feel like a million bucks.

What is the goal you have that motivates you?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Share your Light (1-14-15)

Last week was about mindsets, being a strong dragon, and inspiring others to be strong dragons.  Now that we’re in the right mindset, let’s think more about what we want to do this year.  Dragons get me thinking about fire and light sources, so let’s think this week about developing and sharing our light aka getting our shine on.

If you’re anything like me, when I start thinking of goals for the year one of the things I think about is where I want to improve.  I naturally think about my weaknesses.  At first glance, there isn’t anything wrong with this chain of thinking, but why should I just worry about my weaknesses.  I have an entire collection of things I’m good at, so why I don’t I think about them during this time as well?

This is where the light connection comes into play.  Our light is the collection of our strengths.  These could be skills, personality traits, attitudes, leadership, etc.  Why wouldn’t I make a decision to help me leverage my bright spots?  This is where you can make a decision concerning what you want to do with your light.  Do you want to make it brighter, share it with more people, or both (aka the jackpot scenario)?

For example, you’re good at strategic thinking and you decide to sharpen this skill even more.  You make this strength shine brighter and it helps you throughout the year.  Maybe you have something you are already really good at, so instead you want to share this light with more people.  For example,  maybe you are great at motivating people by recognizing them for their work.  You decide that you want to apply this skill and make an effort to recognize more people.  Share your light.  This example is based off of someone I know who did this last year.  They decided they would write 2 recognition notes every week and send them to different people.  You can bet the farm that people benefited from this person sharing their light.  I was lucky enough to receive one of these notes, and you better believe it put some pep in my stem.

Bottom line, how can you do both?  How can you address a weakness, AND also work on shining your light?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Mighty Mindsets (1-7-15)

Happy New Year! I hope that you had a wonderful and relaxing break. I spent a lot of time hanging out with my family including my amazing wife and two daughters. Today’s blog entry is inspired by my daughter Alice, who will be 3 in April.

Alice and I were cleaning the house while my wife and Violet napped (best X-mas present ever). Anyway, I asked Alice to remove the couch cushions, so I could vacuum up the stuff and rotate them (yep I’m a little obsessive). She told me that the cushions were too heavy. I told her that I knew she could do it. The next thing I know I hear her whispering to herself. She keeps telling herself, “I am a strong dragon!” and then she pulls the cushions off of the couch and throws them down triumphantly.

It’s a cute moment, but you’re probably wondering what it has to do with anything. This is the time of year when many of us start thinking about our goals for the year and what we hope to accomplish. The thing is, it doesn’t matter how great our well thought out your goals are if you aren’t in the right mindset. It all boils down to whether or not you believe you can achieve these goals. Alice changed her mindset, before she reached her goal.

There is another lesson hidden in this story. When she first came to me, her mindset told her she couldn’t do it. I took a few seconds to encourage her and that was the nudge she needed to change her mindset. The moral of the story is that as leaders we need to nudge people to unlock what is there sometimes. This isn’t telling people fluff. It’s about speaking with honest conviction that you believe in them. It’s amazing how powerful a little belief in somebody else can be. One simple moment that really motivated me last year was when I was talking to a mentor about things that I couldn’t figure out. I felt a little lost and a little like I didn’t know if I could get it done. I was talking to him to get his perspective and he tells me with honest conviction, “Don’t shy away from that. That is your leadership opportunity. Step into it. I know you’ll get it done.” A short and simple conversation that got me refocused and ready to go.

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry