Painting and “Blank” Canvases (7-15-20)

Last week was about blind driving and ignorance.  This week is about painting and canvases.  Stick with me for a second, because we are about to dive kind of deep. 

Look at the image above.  There is something on the easel.  What is it?  I’d say that it’s a blank canvas.  What exactly is a blank canvas?  It’s a canvas that doesn’t have anything on it yet.  If a blank canvas is a canvas without anything on it, can that thing on the easel really be a blank canvas?  I’m not sure it is.  The canvas is white, so there is already a background color, meaning the canvas already has something on it and isn’t blank.  The color of the canvas has its own unique properties, influencing how you would have to paint it.  Painting on a white canvas would be different than painting on a red, blue, green, or black canvas.    

What does this have to do with anything?  I see a connection at the macro level and at the more personal level.  At the macro level, when I was younger, I believed that we all had the same exact opportunities, because we all started with the same blank canvas.  Over the years, I’ve realized the canvas of our society isn’t blank.  Instead, there is already stuff on the canvas that we are making our mark on, and what is already on that canvas impacts the ability to paint on it.  Our canvas is comprised of our history, social norms, and laws, which have all been substantially shaped by straight white men.  This backdrop becomes the canvas we start with and has a huge impact on the way we think about race, gender, sexual orientation, and other areas.  The question really becomes whether or not we grasp how the canvas built by the past impacts our current conversations and situations.

At the more personal level, relationships are about making your mark on another person.  With this in mind, no one is a blank canvas.  Everyone has their own canvas filled with their history and experiences that shapes who they are and how they interact in relationships.  The more I can do to show I want to understand them, what makes them tick, and the things that shape their canvas, the more likely they are to open up and share parts of themselves.  We can then use this understanding to connect better.

The challenge: What is already on the “blank” canvas?  How is it shaping you?  How is it shaping our present? 

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Blind Driving, Ignorance, and Causing Harm (7-8-20)

This week we will kick off a series about diversity and inclusion related topics.  This week’s post is about driving, ignorance, and causing harm.  It’s inspired by a question Aaron T., asked me a few weeks ago.

Imagine for a moment you were driving blindfolded.  What would happen?  Chances are you’d hit things, cause all kinds of destruction, and hurt other people and possibly yourself.  If you had the choice, would you rather drive with or without a blindfold on?  I’m assuming you’d want to see, so you could drive more safely.

What does this have to do with anything?  A few weeks ago, I was on an area call sharing my diversity and inclusion journey.  My story isn’t pretty.  It’s a story of being raised color blind and incredibly ignorant, realizing I was (and am still) ignorant, and then working to fix this.  During the story, I spent time talking about being raised to not see race and how that led me to believe and do things that I’d never believe or do now (Is any of that true for you too?).  Aaron then asked me a question that has stuck with me for weeks, “When you were colorblind, how did that harm your relationships and the people you were with?”  His question was a great one, because it punched me right in the heart, and I can’t thank him enough for his courage and willingness to ask it.  I said that I knew there were certain people I had hurt.  However, the truth is, I’ll never know how many people I hurt, because I was blind to my own ignorance and the impact that ignorance was having on others.  For years, I drove blind in a tank, unaware of the damage I was causing, and that’s just straight up horrible. 

The question still sticks with me and is something I think about often, because while I know I am less ignorant than I was when I was younger, my eyes are still not fully open to matters of race, gender, sexual orientation, and the other elements of individuality.  As a result, I continue to be driven to do better, to learn more, to understand more, and to navigate the world a little more carefully so the vehicle I drive out in the world won’t have devastating effects to the people around me.

The challenge: How is your ignorance harming your relationships and the people you are with?  How will you do and be better?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Backpacks and the Weight We Carry (7-6-20)

I hope you enjoyed some well-earned time off last week.  Before we start back up and get lost again in the daily grind, I wanted to share a thought I had over break about hiking, backpacks, and carrying weight on our shoulders.  Last week my family went on a few hikes, and we took a backpack with us filled with the things we thought we needed.  One day we realized the backpack had all the stuff we needed to carry plus other unnecessary junk like trash, toys, old changes of clothes, etc.  We removed those things from the backpack, because they were adding weight we didn’t need to carry.  Instead, we made sure we were only carrying the things we needed.

What does this have to do with anything?  During the summer shutdown I realized I was carrying around an invisible backpack filled with extra weight that didn’t serve me, extra weight that I didn’t need to carry.  That extra weight was from COVID, recent events, unnecessary pressure I was putting on myself at work, the anxiety of navigating a new normal in all the roles I play in life (husband, dad, friend, co-worker), and the ridiculous expectation that I should be able to play all those roles while performing at a level like the external events weren’t happening.  I had been carrying around this extra weight, and I had not been carrying it well either.  I know over the past two months I haven’t been the best version of myself.  I have been tired, short on patience and understanding, low on motivation, and I could feel this negatively impact the different roles in my life.  In many ways, I hadn’t been taking the best care of myself.

My wife and I were about four days into summer shutdown when we realized we both felt lighter, as if someone had taken a huge weight off our shoulders.  We talked about this and realized that as we unplugged, we had also decided to let go of things.  We had removed some of the weight we were carrying around in our invisible backpacks, and that made all the difference.  Summer shutdown came at a perfect time for me.  It gave me an opportunity to drop some of that weight and reset.  It gave me time to reflect on the weight I’ve been carrying, and realize that while I will need to pick some of this weight up I do NOT need to pick up all of it.  I can choose to leave behind unrealistic expectations that created stress and anxiety.  I can try to do a better job of understanding what is in my control and what is outside of my control.  I can choose to take better care of myself.  As work resumes, there are some things I’ll pick up and put into my backpack, and other things I hope to leave on the side of the road.

The challenge: As we start to ramp up again, what weight will you pick up and what will you leave behind?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Restaurants, Serving, and Sprinting (6-24-20)

Last week was about embracing new foods and stepping outside of your comfort zone.  This week is about restaurants, being a server, speed, and thinking.

Back in college I was a waiter at an O’Charley’s.  In case you’ve never been to an O’Charley’s it is like an Applebee’s.  The main difference is that O’Charley’s has some AMAZING rolls.  Anyway, when I first started my job as a waiter, I found myself running around constantly back and forth between the kitchen and my tables.  I would go get refills for one table, then get to another table and realize they needed refills, so I would have to go back and get them refills.  By the end of the night I was exhausted from running back and forth.  Over time, I began to realize that I was working very hard, but I wasn’t working very smart.  Instead of only thinking about one table at a time, I began looking at multiple tables.  Instead, of making individual trips back to the kitchen, I would go back to the kitchen and take care of the needs for multiple tables.  Taking a few extra seconds to look around to see who needed refills, more rolls, checked on, etc. enabled me to save steps and avoid sprinting back and forth throughout the night.  This led to me being more efficient and effective, which eventually led to me receiving better tips.

You might be wondering where this server story is going.  I don’t know about you, but from time to time I get sucked into the frenzy of work where I sprint from project to project and place to place.  By the end of the day I feel exhausted.  Have you ever felt this way?  When you felt like this, how productive were you?  If you’re anything like me, during these times you weren’t as productive as you could be.  I’ve realized over time that whenever I feel like I’m sprinting out of control I need to pause for a moment.  Just like my server days, I need to stop for a moment to look around and figure out what is going on.  Rather than sprinting, I need to pause, survey the situation, and figure out a plan.  Taking a few minutes to think through things usually results in me figuring out ways to avoid pitfalls and eliminate extra steps.  At the end of the day, spending a few minutes to pause and think, saves me hours of running around.

The challenge:  Will you take a few moments to pause and plan vs. running around?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Being Open to New Food and New Experiences (6-17-20)

Last week was about restaurants fulfilling multiple purposes.  This week is about being open to new food and new experiences. 

My friend Joseph’s dad is from Ethiopia.  Joseph grew up embracing that part of his heritage and culture, including the food.  One day Joseph and I were talking about an Ethiopian lasagna he makes.  I asked him about it, and then he asked me if I had ever had Ethiopian food.  I told him I had never tried it, so he took me to a restaurant called Abyssinia.  When we got there, Joseph asked me what I wanted to order.  At this point I had a choice.  I could order the things I thought I might be most comfortable with based on what I usually eat, or I could allow myself to fully embrace a new experience.  I told him something along the lines of, “I just want great Ethiopian food.  I’m open to anything.  You know this better than I do.”  He did the ordering, and truth be told, if I was left to my own devices I may not have ordered some of the dishes by reading about them on the menu, because they were a little outside my comfort zone.  However, once I tried the food, I thought it was delicious, and I was so thankful Joseph was there to help broaden my horizons.

You might be wondering what this has to do with anything.  Similar to eating at restaurants, I believe there are two types of people.  There are those who live only in their comfort zones, and there are people open to exploring new experiences to find unexpected joy.  Think about yourself for a moment.  How often do you only allow yourself to experience people/situations/things you are comfortable with vs. being open to new experiences?  I know I fall into this trap sometimes.  I decide what the mold is and look for people/things to fit that mold, and I stick with people and things who fit my comfort zone.  If those people/things don’t fit that mold I can be disappointed and miss out on the beauty of what is, because I’m blinded by the contrived aspect of what I thought I wanted it to be.

Challenge:  Will you be open to new people and new experiences?

Bonus thought: There is a lot of stuff going on right now.  I’m sure some of it is making you uncomfortable to some degree.  I’d encourage you to be open to what is going on, to explore it, and to lean into the things that are challenging your worldview vs. tuning it out because it makes you uncomfortable.  Leaning into it is the only way we can grow.

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Restaurants and the Purposes they Serve (6-10-20)

Happy Wednesday,

This week I want to kick off a series inspired by restaurants.  We will start by looking at the purpose restaurants serve, and how it doesn’t always have to do with food. 

One of my favorite restaurants is a local brewpub called Moontown.  The obvious purpose of a restaurant is to solve for your hunger and thirst.  For me, Moontown hits on this aspect with their brisket and this amazing chicken sandwich they make with this Bama White sauce that is a mix of ranch and horseradish.  Moontown hits on the beverage front by providing a variety of beers in different styles, and they introduce new beers on a regular basis.  #awesomeness  What I’ve come to appreciate, especially during COVID, is that Moontown served a purpose for me beyond food and beverages.  It gave me a great environment to write in.  There’s something about the wooden bar and tables, the lighting, and the atmosphere that creates a space that feels comfortable and quiet.  Before COVID, I would go to the bar after the girls were asleep and I’d bring a notebook.  I’d have a pint and some fries as I sketched out ideas for blogs, poems, and even marketing plans (don’t tell anyone on that last one😉).

What does this have to do with anything?  The situation above shows that something or some place, can serve multiple purposes in your life.  Moontown fulfilled my basic need for food and beverage, and it also served an entirely different function by providing a great space to write.  I find it fascinating that one thing can serve multiple purposes, and sometimes can even serve positive and negative functions at the same time.  Think about some of your beliefs and behaviors.  What purposes do they serve?  For me, eating sweets can satisfy a sweet tooth and also be a non-healthy stress coping mechanism.  Running can serve my need for exercise, and also create quiet in my brain so I can slow down to focus.  Building relationships with people fulfills my need to be social, and also provides me an ability to get work done.  Lately I’ve found myself reflecting more on my own beliefs, behaviors, and habits to determine if they are serving the purpose, I want them to serve.  This is leading me to think more about where I want and need to change to become a better human. 

The challenge: What purpose are your beliefs, behaviors, and habits serving?  Are they serving the purposes you want them to serve?

I stand in solidarity against injustice and in support of humanity.

Bonus: If you want to apply this concept to marketing you should read this article about jobs to be done and milkshakes.

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Investments and Returns (6-3-20)

Last week was about diversifying how you spend your time to help you be a better human, and Friday’s bonus entry was about investing time and effort in becoming more anti-racist.  This is our final entry in the series about investments and it is about investments and returns. 

Let’s pretend for a moment I’m a financial advisor.  I explain that you can choose to invest in fund A or B.  How would you decide to invest your money?  I bet that before you did anything, you would want to better understand funds A and B and their rate of returns.  After you understood that, then you could evaluate the tradeoffs and decide how to invest.

What does this have to do with anything?  In the above example, you would want to understand the potential return, so you could assess the trade-offs and make the right decision.  I see two applications of this idea.  The first application comes to the work we do.  We all have more work than we can handle, so we must make decisions on where to INVEST our time.  How often do you pause to think about the RETURN you could get for your effort and then invest your time accordingly?  I don’t always do this.  Sometimes I just start doing the things on my to-do list without thinking about what is important.  Other times, I get lost trying to make something perfect, and all the extra hours I put in didn’t give me much return.

The other connection is about investing in each other.  The other day my wife walked into our makeshift office, and she saw me writing an email with a meme telling the person they were awesome.  My wife asked me how much time I spend recognizing others and helping them feel valued.  I laughed, because I don’t look at that as spending time.  I look at this act as INVESTING time.  Furthermore, it’s the best and smartest investment I can make out of all the things I do.  I’d argue the same would be true for you.  Here’s why.  I want to have a positive impact on the people we serve.  I’m not smart enough or talented enough to do that on my own.  Also, the work I do is so complicated that I can’t do it on my own, so I need help to reach my goal.  As a result, I invest in people.  I give them my energy, effort, compassion, and words of appreciation.  In return, I gain teammates and friends.  These teammates and friends share their brainpower and skills.  Together, we do incredible things, ultimately delivering the impact I want to deliver in the world, which makes me feel fulfilled.  The only way I can reach my goals is by investing in others.

Challenge 1: Will you be more aware of how you invest your time and what returns you will get (for both projects and people)?

Challenge 2:  Spend a few minutes investing in someone else today with a few words of recognition or something else.

Sending peace and love,

Andrew Embry

Are we investing time and effort in becoming more anti-racist? (5-29-20)

Today Lilly recognizes a day of solidarity to support one another during this time and stand together against injustice and in support of humanity.  With this in mind, I’d like to share a bonus blog for the week.  We will stick with our finance theme and reflect on investing for long-term goals and investing in becoming more anti-racist.

When I first met with my financial advisor, I explained what the goals are for my family when it comes to investing.  One of these goals is to be able to pay for a certain percentage of college for each of my daughters.  When I shared this with him he did an analysis to see how I was doing against the goal.  When he came back, he told me I wasn’t doing enough.  If I really wanted to reach that goal, my family would need to take action and invest more time and resources into the college fund.  Since then, I’ve taken action and invested more resources to reach this goal.

What does investing for college have to do with recent injustices?  When it comes to my financial goals, it’s really simple.  I’m either investing enough energy to achieve them or I’m not.  Period.  There is NO gray space.  Merely thinking about how important it is to save for college isn’t enough.  All that matters is whether or not I put enough of my energy toward achieving this goal.  This idea of whether or not we are putting enough energy and resources to achieving a goal applies to the recent injustices we have witnessed.  If our goal is to create a society where everyone truly is equal, then as individuals we are either investing our time and energy into becoming more anti-racist or we are allowing ourselves to further a racist system.  Period. 

The recent murders of George Floyd, Ahmaud Arbery, and Breonna Taylor along with Amy Cooper leveraging her white privilege to harm Christian Cooper have continued to demonstrate that there is no such thing as neutral when it comes to racism and matters of race.  There is no middle ground.  You are either investing the time, effort, and resources to make things better or you are not.  Merely thinking that racism is bad isn’t enough.  Trying to be colorblind is not okay.  Merely thinking that you aren’t racist and wouldn’t commit the same acts isn’t enough.  We (and by we I mean primarily white people, because white people are the ones who have the most power to address these issues) need to do better and be better.  We say we want an equal society, and if that’s true we need to take action to make that happen. 

Challenge: How are you investing your time and effort to make things better?  What are you doing to become more anti-racist?

In full vulnerability, I know I can do more and do better, and that’s something I’m continuing to reflect and act on.  Resources with suggestions on things you can do

Sending you love, peace, and prayers,

Andrew Embry

The Importance of Diversifying your Investments (5-27-20)

Last week was about 401(k)s, the company match, and understanding what “match” you offer to others.  This week is about the importance of diversifying.  Any financial article I’ve read or expert I’ve spoken with has mentioned the importance of diversification within a portfolio and across investment vehicles.  The primary reason you diversify is to minimize risk and enable better outcomes. 

What does this have to do with anything?  What if we thought about diversifying the way we invest our time the same way we thought about diversifying our financial investments?  Are we diligent enough to diversify how we spend our time across the different aspects of life?  Whether diversifying financial investments or time investments, you primarily to it to reduce risk and enable better outcomes.  In the finance world, if you dump everything into one investment and it goes wrong you lose your money.  In the non-finance realm, if you dump all of your time into one thing, you lose out on so many aspects of life that make it worth being human.

Have you ever allowed yourself to be totally consumed by something?  For me, it can be work.  Last week I hit a wall, because I realized I was putting all my time into work and neglecting the other aspects of life.  This realization inspired this week’s blog.  Throughout my life I’ve seen individuals who put all of their eggs into the work basket, and then never find the fulfillment and joy they were looking for because they didn’t diversify their time investments.  The most content happiest people I know are the ones who diversify their time across aspects of life.  They invest some in work, some in their partner and/or family, some in friends, some in a cause larger than themselves, and some in themselves and their hobbies (even if the hobbies have no “payoff”). 

Challenge 1 : How are you investing your time?  Are you diversifying enough to be the best human you can be?

Challenge 2:  Especially if you are an official leader with authority, are you taking the time to let others know you are diversifying your time?  Are you taking the time to let them know it’s okay to step away from work to spend time on themselves, their spouse, their kids, their friends, etc.?  In case you don’t know, the act of you sharing could go a long way coming from you.

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

401(k)s and Matching (5-20-20)

Last week was about investing in relationships with people in tough times.  This week is about 401(k)s and the company match.

The 401(k) is one of the most popular retirement vehicles out there.  There are different nuances to the 401(k), but there are some similar components.  There is the amount that you invest and often there is an amount or percentage that a company is willing to match.  The company match is a mechanism used to encourage people to invest in their retirement.  If your company is going to offer a 6% match, you’re likely to put a minimum of 6% of your salary into the 401(k).  If your company match is higher or lower than that, you are likely to follow suit and at a minimum invest that amount of money in the plan to take advantage of the free money. 

What does this have to do with anything?  The company match is just a way of encouraging you to take action to invest.  What if we applied this same thinking to leaders, culture, and teams?  Throughout my experience in work and life, I feel that most people will match the energy/vibes of their leader.  If the leader sets “the match” with behaviors that drive inclusion, teamwork, high standards, and performance, then others will rise to match that.  If the leader sets “the match” with behaviors that drive competition between teammates, distrust, and lack of clarity, then others will match that.

Take a second and look at yourself and your leadership.  What “match” are you offering to people?  How are you offering that “match”?  How are they responding to that “match”?  Gut check yourself.  If you don’t instantly have clear answers to those questions, then you probably aren’t guiding people as well as you think you are.

The challenge: As a leader, what “match” are you offering?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry