Spidey-Sense and How Emotions Communicate with Us (5-5-21)

Last week was about candy and toxic positivity. This week is about Spider-man’s Spidey-sense and what emotions communicate to us.

Spider-man is one of my favorite superheroes. On top of his super strength, amazing agility, web swinging, and wall climbing, he also has his Spidey-sense. His Spidey-sense is his body communicating with him that something isn’t quite right, so he can take action. Maybe, it’s a warning of a sneak attack that is going to happen. He feels his Spidey-sense, understands the meaning, and then he dodges the sneak attack. Maybe, it’s a warning that he’s being deceived. He feels his Spidey-sense, understands the meaning, and then keeps his eyes open for deception. Whatever the situation, by listening to his Spidey-sense he is better prepared to face whatever is happening.

What does Spider-man’s Spidey-sense have to do with emotions? I don’t know about you, but sometimes I treat emotions as something that I just need to get through. This is particularly true for emotions we consider to be negative. When I experience those, I want to just get them out of my system as soon as possible so I can go back to feeling happy again. Do you ever feel this way? (#toxicpositivity)

What if emotions are our own Spidey-sense? How would things change if we treated emotions as sensations that were trying to communicate something to us? I know that whenever I take time to truly sit with my emotions and listen to them, I learn more about myself. As a human, I may not always know what I want/need out of life, but love or sadness or anger or joy can be key to helping me discover these things. I only need to be willing to listen.

The challenge: Are you listening to what your emotions are telling you?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Loyalty, Time, and the Cost of a Batphone (6-29-16)

A couple of weeks ago we talked about being intentional with people. This week we will explore the result of being intentional with people by looking at the cost/value of a Batphone. In DC Comics Batman has given Commissioner Jim Gordon a Batphone, which is a direct line that enables Gordon to call Batman whenever he needs help. This Batphone gives the Commissioner access to Batman and everything he has. It’s virtually priceless. Something worth so much, must cost a great deal, so what did it cost Gordon to earn the Batphone? The “cost” was the TIME and EFFORT it took Gordon to prove to Batman that he was a partner in the fight against crime.

How does this connect to work? Think about the people you work with. Who has given you a Batphone, a promise to help you whenever, with all of their might? Who have you given a Batphone to? Who would you bend over backwards to help and why? What did it “cost” them?

I’d like to share the story of how I recently gave a Batphone to Sally (made up name for a real story). I don’t work for her or owe her anything. I just happened to work on a project with her, so why would I give her a Batphone? One day Sally was so busy she didn’t even have time to eat lunch. We had a one on one meeting scheduled. I saw her and saw how busy she was, so I told her that I didn’t have anything uber critical at that time, so we didn’t need to meet that day. She could have walked away, but instead she said she wanted to meet with me anyway. I didn’t have anything business critical, so why did she want to meet? She told me, “I just want to know how you’re doing with work and life and that I’m giving you everything you need to be successful on this project you’re helping with.” We spent 15 talking about life and work. How do you think this made me feel? At the time she didn’t realize this was a big deal for me, but that moment right there was when I knew I’d go the extra mile for her just because she showed she cared. Her “down payment” on a Batphone to Andrew Embry “cost” her 15 minutes and a display of caring.

What does an Embry Batphone get you? An Embry Batphone gets you access to everything I can do and everything I have in my possession to help you. The other day Sally emailed me to ask a favor that had nothing to do with the project or any other work I was doing. When I saw the email was from her, I stopped the work I was doing on another project so I could send her a thoughtful response to her email in an immediate fashion. I also told her I’d be willing to chat more if she wanted. She was appreciative and thankful, so I told her just to ask if she ever thought I could help and I’d do what I could to provide some ideas. Then I sent her the Batphone image in this email and said, “Consider this your Batphone. Call whenever you need me.” I don’t work for Sally. I don’t owe her anything, but I choose to offer her everything because of her spending the time and effort to show she cares about me. For 15 minutes and a few other “small” gestures she gets a Batphone to Andrew Embry and everything that comes with it.

The Challenge: What are you doing to earn a Batphone from the people you work with?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Superhero Lessons Part 7 Spider-man Wisdom (5-11-16)

This is going to be the last in the series of lessons I’ve learned from superheroes. We started with a story about finding and reaching the finish line with Batman and The Flash. Then, we talked about how we need to overcome our fear like Green Lantern in order to reach our goals. We also talked about embracing all sides of ourselves (Wonder Woman) and embracing all sides of our teams (X-men). We’ve talked about Iron Man and understanding that we can’t be everything to everyone. Last week we thought about how we can learn to view the world differently from a blind superhero named Daredevil. This week we’ll wrap everything up in webs and end this series with wisdom from Spider-man.

If you have ever heard of Spider-man you have probably heard the quote, “With great power comes great responsibility.” The short version of the story is that Peter Parker had been granted amazing powers after a being bitten by a radioactive spider. There was a bad guy that he could have stopped with his powers, but he chose not to. That bad guy then ended up killing his Uncle Ben. From that point on Peter Parker became Spider-man and set out to use his powers for good, because he realized it was his responsibility to do so.

So what does this have to do with our work? We all have great power. The power could come in the form of authority, influence, and/or the strengths that we can share. We started this series by talking about reaching a finish line, and I firmly believe it is all of our responsibilities to use the powers we have to help our teammates cross that finish line. Someone once asked me why I blog and perform poetry at Lilly. It’s because those are the superpowers I was born with. If I had been born with tremendous intellect or other skills I would be using those to help others, but I don’t have those things. Instead, I tell stories and share poems. These were the superpowers I was born with, but they aren’t “mine”. They are a blessing on loan. If I can use my words to make a difference, if I can write something that inspires people to think differently, if I can do anything to bring people together, if I can find a way to give people a little boost when they need it, then it’s my responsibility to do so.

The Challenge: What are you doing with your superpowers?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Superhero Lessons Part 6 Daredevil and Seeing the World (5-4-16)

Last week we talked about Iron Man who uses technology and armor to set himself up for success. This week we’ll think about viewing the world from a new perspective by looking at the lessons we can learn from Daredevil, a blind superhero (Yes, you read that sentence correctly.)

If you don’t know the story of Daredevil you might be wondering how someone who is blind ends up ever becoming a superhero. Matt Murdock (Daredevil) was born perfectly healthy. When he was a young kid he was involved in an accident where his eyes were covered in toxic materials causing his blindness. Although the accident caused him to go blind it also heightened all of his other senses to superhuman levels. Imagine being able to hear the faintest of noises from blocks away. Imagine smelling something and being able to trace its location. Imagine being able to feel the changes in the air temperature to estimate how many people were entering a room. Daredevil may not be able to see, but his combined super senses give him a unique way to see the world around him and fight crime. As Matt grows up he witnesses a series of tragedies in his home of Hell’s Kitchen in New York City, and he vows to fight injustice by day as an attorney and by night as Daredevil.

What does a blind vigilante superhero have to do with anything? Daredevil shows us how much we can miss by becoming overly reliant on our eyes and our first impressions. Daredevil is unable to see, so he has to piece together the world around him with the context he acquires through his other senses and intuition.

Think about work for a moment. How reliant are we on our eyes and the first things that we see? Maybe this is the first impression of someone. Maybe this is an action committed by someone that leads us to make a snap judgment. Maybe this is the first time hearing an idea. How often do we make snap decisions after taking a glance at something or someone? How often do we take the time to try to piece things together using other data sources and perspectives from other people in the same way Daredevil uses his senses to create a radar perspective of the world around him?

The challenge: You can use your eyes to see the world or you can use your whole being to truly comprehend and experience the world. What are you doing?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Superhero Lessons Part 5 Iron Man and Arming Ourselves for Success (4-27-16)

Last week we talked about X-men and working together to achieve goals. Bonus points for the cool names people submitted. This week I want us to think about how we properly arm ourselves for success and how that relates to Iron Man. In case you don’t know, Tony Stark is a billionaire science genius who put his brains to work to help the world as a scientist and as the superhero Iron Man!

Here is one of the interesting things about Iron Man. His suit isn’t just a suit he wears to cover up his identify. His suit is armor that he builds. Tony realizes that the situations he faces are often unique and that it would be IMPOSSIBLE to create one set of armor that could do everything. While most superheroes wear the same thing all the time, Iron Man designs, builds, and changes his gear based on the SPECIFIC situation at hand. He has his basic armor, and then he has armor built to last in outer space, armor for undersea exploring, armor built for speed, stealth armor, his Hulk busting armor (see pic), and many more. Each set of armor has its pros and cons. For example, his stealth armor is fast and agile, but not very powerful. His Hulk buster armor gives him strength but not agility.

What can we learn from Iron Man and his armor built for specific situations? How many times do you start a project or create a tactic intended to solve 1 specific problem, and then scope creep sets in and turns the project into a Frankenstein monster that is supposed to accomplish everything? How effective does that end up being? Does it actually meet anyone’s needs? In the end, something that attempts to do everything doesn’t do anything particularly well.

Now think about yourself. How often do you feel like you are one suit of armor trying to be an expert in everything? How often do you feel like you have to be everything to everybody? The best decision I ever made was that I don’t need to be everything to everybody. I finally came to grips with the fact that it’s okay that there are some situations where I’ll be great and some where I’ll be bad. I’m great armor for big ideas, energy, and funkiness. I’m bad armor for rules and processes, and that’s okay because there are many other people better suited to tackle those problems.

The challenge: Be like Tony Stark. Understand that 1 solution can’t solve all problems. Understand that you can’t be everything for everyone. Build your special suit of armor that accentuates you!

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Superhero Lessons Part 4 Teamwork and the X-men (4-20-16)

Last week we talked about Wonder Woman and embracing the different sides of ourselves. This week we will talk about the X-men and truly embracing the different people on our teams. When we think about superheroes we often think about individuals and what they can accomplish on their own. I want us to contrast that with the X-men, a team of super powered individuals. They work together to defeat the largest threats to the world.

The X-men is a team that was created by Professor Charles Xavier, a telepath, who wanted to bring young mutants together to teach them how to control their powers (a mutant is a person born with special DNA that gives them powers). From there, Xavier’s students became his X-men, a team that fights supervillains. Throughout the years the team has had several members with a wide variety of mutant powers including rapid healing and enhanced senses (Wolverine), super strength (Colossus), the ability to control the weather (Storm), the ability to shoot lasers out of their eyes (Cyclops), a person who can run through walls (Kitty Pryde), a guy who can teleport (Nightcrawler), and more.

What do the X-men have to do with anything? Any of these individual X-men would be a powerful force on their own, but together they accomplish even more amazing things. Think about the teams you work on. These are your fellow X-men. What powers do they have? More importantly, are you leveraging those superpowers or are you going at it alone with just your own super skills?

Andrew’s work example. My mutant abilities include an amazing beard and a knack for seeing the essence in things. I’m working on a project and those skills help me, but they can’t get me where I need to go on my own. Instead of trying to go at it alone, I go and talk to T, who has the ability to make numbers talk to him, and I ask him to use his data mind to help me figure out an approach. I go and talk to B, who has the ability to ask the question that completely shifts your paradigm, and she helps me see that I’m missing a few angles. I talk to C, who has driver skills and can figure out the next practical step you need to take to move things along. I combine all of our powers and perspectives together, and it makes me smarter and my project that much stronger. I couldn’t do it alone, but I could reach out to my fellow X-men to make progress.

Bottom line: Are you going alone or are you leveraging the mutant abilities of your teammates?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Superhero Lessons Part 3 Wonder Woman, Warrior AND Princess (4-13-16)

Last week we talked about Green Lantern and conquering fear. This week, we will think about Wonder Woman and how we can tackle those “supposed” contradictions within all of us in order to make ourselves stronger.

Wonder Woman is one of the most powerful characters in the DC Universe. I believe that she is one of the few characters who could go toe to toe with Superman in a fistfight, and I also believe she would have a great chance at winning because of her strength, brains, and magic lasso. In case you don’t know, Superman is vulnerable to magic, so that could play into Wonder Woman’s hands with her lasso and weapons. Also, her bracelets could reflect his laser vision. Finally, she’s an Amazon warrior. Nuff said.

Anyway, Wonder Woman is a fascinating character to me, because she is a collection of traits that are “supposed to be” contradictions. She’s a warrior AND a princess. She’s strong AND feminine. She’s a leader AND a servant. She’s caring AND tough. She’s all powerful AND merciful. She’s not one or the other. She is ALL of these things wrapped up into one person. She’s an example of how the different sides of us don’t have to be at odds with each other. In fact, we are richer when these different sides work together inside ourselves.

What does this have to do with life? In life we don’t always appreciate the complexity of people. Instead, we often want to make people choose to be one thing or the other. You are either a jokester or someone who takes their job seriously. You are either a leader or a follower. You are either creative or methodical. You are either strong or vulnerable. You are either an expert or a student.

If Wonder Woman would wrap us in her Lasso of Truth we’d quickly see that we don’t have to choose between these false dichotomies that we set up. Instead, we can be both. We can be a collection of traits that are “supposed to be” contradictions, and that is what can make us powerful.

The challenge: How can you be like Wonder Woman and embrace all sides of yourself?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Superhero Lessons Part 2 Green Lantern and Overcoming Fear (4-6-16)

Last week we talked about Batman, The Flash, and knowing where the finish line is before you take off sprinting. This week I want us to look at something else that could get in the way of us reaching the finish line. That thing is FEAR.

Maybe you have heard of the Green Lantern. Green Lantern is basically an intergalactic cop with a power ring that he uses to fight bad guys. The ring is powered by will/grit/determination. This ring allows him to use his imagination to create anything he needs to make to save the day. For example, say he was surrounded by bad guys with guns. He might create a huge shield that blocks all of their bullets. Maybe an airplane is going to crash, so he could create a large hand to catch it. As long as he has the will and the imagination he can virtually do anything.

All superheroes have an arch nemesis. The Green Lantern’s vile villain is Sinestro, a Yellow Lantern (see picture). While Green Lantern is powered by will, Yellow Lanterns like Sinestro are powered by FEAR. The whole idea is that fear is the largest threat to someone’s will to do something. When fear comes into play the Green Lantern loses his will, his imagination, and his power. Green Lantern and Sinestro have clashed time and time again with Green Lantern always finding a way to overcome fear in order to beat Sinestro.

What does an intergalactic cop have to do with work? It all comes down to your willpower versus the fear you face. How often are we excited about a great idea that withers away because fear sets in? How often do we allow fear to chip away at our self-confidence? We become worried the idea won’t work. We become worried that other people might judge us. Before we know it, our imagination, our power, our will has been crushed by fear. We can’t remove fear from our lives, but we can overcome it.

Challenge: How will you overcome fear, so your willpower can make your thoughts a reality?

Bonus Confessions: Things that fill me with fear on a regular basis that I have to find ways to overcome. Maybe we share a few of these in common.

Being a dad-> Am I doing this right? Am I setting the girls up for success? Do I know what I need to know?
Being incompetent in this role-> How long do I get to play the new guy card until people just say I’m incompetent? Am I valuable to anybody?
Sending out my blogs-> Every week I ask myself: Is this any good? Is this weird that I’m sending these out? Do people think I’m arrogant for doing this?
Performing poetry/giving speeches-> I’m good at these things, so I shouldn’t have fear but I still do. All the way up to the point I step on stage I worry about crashing and

burning. Will I forget my words? Will the audience accept something like this? Will people listen? Is this the right message? Will this make me weird in people’s eyes?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Superhero Lessons Part 1 The Flash vs. Batman: A Battle of Speed and Thought (3-30-16)

This week we are going to kick off a series of lessons inspired by superheroes. We’ll start by thinking about speed, direction, Batman, and The Flash.

Imagine for a moment that Batman challenges The Flash to a race. The Flash accepts. The two racers meet at the starting line. The Flash will do the race on foot and Batman will drive the Batmobile. Alfred says, “Go!” and the racers take off. The Flash takes off heading north at the speed of sound, roughly 768 mph. Meanwhile, Batman jumps into the Batmobile, enters coordinates into the Bat GPS and starts heading south at his top speed of 230 mph. Batman wins the race.

The Flash is more than 3 times faster than Batman in his Batmobile, so how does Batman win? For the sake of argument, let’s just say that Batman wins, because he takes the time to figure out where the finish line is before he goes. This is why Batman headed south when The Flash headed north. In our story we’ll pretend that The Flash was so excited about racing that he took off before ever knowing where the finish line was. This probably sounds pretty comical. This is a silly gag that would show up in a poorly written comic. You’d probably read this and say, “Come on! The Flash would never do anything like that.”

Now here’s the gut check. How often are you sprinting at work without understanding where the finish line is? This never happens to me, because I’m so awesome. However, I have a friend who likes superheroes and has two daughters and I hear this has happened to him before. My friend even told me it has happened to him over the past month. My friend says, he probably shouldn’t admit his shortcomings, but the last time he checked he’s still human and he still can’t walk on water, so mistakes are part of being human. My friend wonders if anyone else has made the same mistake. (<-Comic sans font equals obnoxious sarcasm)

Bottom line: It is way too easy to get sucked into the flurry of activity, the need to feel like you’re sprinting and contributing, but the fact is that speed without the proper direction is useless. Even worse, speed with the wrong direction can be detrimental.

The Challenge: Before you use your Flash speed, will you use your Batman intellect to locate the finish line?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Learning like Rogue (1-13-16)

Last week we asked what your name would mean as a verb. Once you know what you want your name to mean, the question is, “How can I grow to make this a reality?” We’ll answer this question by thinking about a comic book character named Rogue. Rogue is a mutant in the Marvel universe who has the ability to absorb powers by touching someone. For example, if she touched the Hulk she would gain super strength or if she touched Spider-man she could climb walls. In short, Rogue enhances her powers by leveraging the people around her.

What if we could learn and develop like Rogue? Imagine for a moment you wanted to become a better strategic thinker. All you would have to do is find someone who is a great strategic thinker, give them a high five, and then you would absorb their skills. How cool would that be?

What does this have to do our jobs? If I’ve ever done anything to impress you, there is a 99.4% chance that what I did is either a new skill I’ve picked up from someone or one of my natural talents that has been made stronger by adding what I’ve learned from someone else. The other .6% of me impressing you is with my beard and I take full credit for that 😉 Although we can’t develop skills like Rogue, we can still absorb skills from each other. I’ve found that my learning can come from more than formal coaching sessions or one off events. I’ve learned that if I spend a little time being more observant and intentional I can take away lessons by watching how the people around me operate and look at the world. I can take their strengths and learn from them to make myself better.

Every day we tackle challenges that require dynamic leadership, strategic thinking, great communication, and many more skills. Every one of these moments is a chance to look at our peers and learn from them. Every moment is a chance to jot down those great strategic questions that Bob asked during the meeting, so you can apply them to other projects. It’s a chance to observe what it was about Sally’s leadership that caused her to be successful and how you could add that to your skill set. It’s a chance to watch Bill solve a problem and then apply his thought process to other obstacles you are facing. It’s an opportunity to be impressed by Susie’s presentation and ask her how she decided to tell the story in that way so you can prepare in a similar fashion. If we do this right it becomes a beautiful cycle of observing->absorbing->growing.

We work with some incredibly gifted and talented people. What if we could tap into all of those superpowers to make ourselves better? Are you taking advantage of learning from those around you? How are you absorbing their superpowers and putting them to good use? Who will you teach and who will you learn from?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry