Dusting Off Shelves and Skills (9-6-17)

Last week was about taking out the trash and letting go.  This week we will reflect on dusting, and taking the time to brush off your skills (and your shoulders if you are Jay-Z).  By the way, this week is dedicated to Hannah Short, because she is the one who said we need to do something on dusting. 

You may not know this about me, but I’m a cleaner.  I’m not obsessive about cleaning, but I do enjoy keeping everything relatively clean, which means I am definitely someone who dusts.  I dust in order to keep things clean, tidy, and functioning.  Not only do I dust, but where I come from, there are two kinds of dusting (#dustingsnob).  There is feather dusting, which is a relatively quick exercise, where you use the feather dusting to brush off things where they are.  It takes minimal time and effort, and is best suited as something that is done between serious cleaning.  Feather dusting keeps things from getting too dirty.  Then, there is real dusting where you bust out some pledge, take EVERYTHING off the shelves, and go after dust bunnies like you were a fox.  This is more labor intensive, but it also helps you achieve a deeper clean and isn’t that what everyone wants in life?  It’s not that one kind of dusting is necessarily better than the other, but each one has different purposes and uses.

So what does this have to do with work?  It’s really easy to avoid dusting.  Then, all of a sudden when you do look at stuff you realize there are dust bunnies, gunk, and grime covering everything and messing stuff up.  I feel the same can be said about work.  It’s really easy to get so lost in the day to day stuff that we ignore the dirt and grime that find a way to bog down our skills and capabilities.  When we ignore dusting, we ignore ourselves, and we take away our chance to get better.   Seriously, how often do you stop and take a few moments to think about you and brushing off your skills?  Just like at home, I feel that there are a couple of different ways of dusting things off at work.  You can feather dust, which to me is taking a few minutes to stop and reflect on something you’ve recently experienced, read, watched, etc.  You can also roll up your sleeves and do some deep cleaning, whether that is going to workshops, deep diving with a trusted mentor/coach/colleague, or some other activity that requires you to go to a deeper level.

The challenge: Are you taking the time to dust?  Do you have a specific skill or competency you want to dust off?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Taking out the Trash and Letting Go (8-30-17)

Last week was about ironing and development.  This week we are going to think about taking out the trash and releasing negative emotions.  Fair warning, this blog might trigger your olfactory senses.

Pretend for a moment that you came over to my house.  The moment you walk in you encounter a powerful odor, a disgusting overwhelming smell.  You see me sitting at the kitchen table and you ask me, “Why does your house smell so bad?”  I simply shrug and say, “I don’t smell anything that bad.”

You begin searching my house for the smell and finally you realize the problem.  The garbage can is overflowing.  There are empty food containers, dirty diapers, mold, and all kinds of disgusting stuff.  You grab me and say, “Why didn’t you ever take the trash out?”  I respond by saying, “I just got caught up and stuff and never thought about it.”  Eventually I take out the trash and let the house air out.  By the next day everything smells so much better and I’m thankful I’ve removed the garbage from my home.

You’re probably wondering what taking the garbage out has to do with work.  Let me ask you a question.  Have you ever held onto some negative thing someone said or a negative emotion longer than you should have?  I know I do that sometimes.  I get bitter, angry, jealous, upset, hurt, etc. and I bottle it up and hold onto it.  Sometimes I hold onto a mistake I made.  Sometimes I hold onto something someone said.  Sometimes I hold onto my own self-doubt and insecurities.  After a period of time I don’t even realize I’m holding onto those things anymore.  Just like keeping trash in my house, sooner or later my whole entire being stinks and becomes toxic.  This not only hurts me, but it also impacts the way I interact with people.  Throughout this entire process what I really need to do is realize that negativity is something I need to let go of.  I need to release it so it can be taken away.  Sometimes, you can do this on your own, and sometimes you need a friend or someone to help you let go of things.

Now here’s an important nuance.  I’m not saying negative emotions or experiences are bad.  What I’m saying is that when we encounter these emotions we need to learn what we can from them and then let them go.  It’s kind of like eating a banana.  I eat the banana, and then I throw away what’s left because I can’t use it anymore.  I need to take the mistake/criticism/self-doubt learn what I can and then move on.

The challenge: Are you taking out the trash when you need to?  Are you letting go of your toxic emotions?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Ironing, the Need for Heat, and Development (8-23-17)

This week I’d like to kick off a new series on lessons learned from doing things around the house.  Sounds thrilling, right?  This series is either going to be horrible or it will bring the heat.  Speaking of bringing the heat, let’s kick this off by thinking about ironing and development.  (In case you’re wondering, I’m always this smooth with my bad jokes).

About once a month I iron all my dress shirts, polos, dress pants, and anything else that needs to be ironed.  Recently, I finished ironing a bunch of clothes, and had to take them upstairs so I momentarily unplugged the iron and took the shirts up to my closet.  When I came back, I started using the iron and quickly realized it wasn’t working.  At first I was confused, and then realized I never plugged the iron back in.  No electricity meant no heat, which meant the iron couldn’t do its job.  It was at this point I had a minor epiphany about how ironing is always a delicate balance.  You need to have heat to smooth out wrinkles, but not too much heat or you’ll burn the garment.

You might be wondering what this has to do with work.  Well, I think we could all use a little ironing sometimes.  We could all use something to help us smooth out our wrinkles and make us a little sharper, a little better.  Much like the iron, I think we need heat to do this.  In this case, heat could be a challenge, positive tension, coaching, a difficult conversation, making mistakes, failing, etc.  If you don’t have those things, you never have what you need to grow.  The trick is to find the balance in the heat.  Too little challenge/positive tension/coaching/mistakes and nothing gets smoothed out.  Too much, and you get burned out, damaged, and worse off than you were before.  It’s up to us to find the heat in our jobs that helps us go to the next level. 

Embry example->  When I talk to people about what kind of work I like I say, “I like messy and muddy problems.”  I don’t like those things because they are easy.  I like those things because they force me to grow and smooth out some of my rough spots, and I know I have more than my fair share of rough spots.  Over the past few months I’ve had a lot of things I’ve worked on for the first time.  Whether it was running market research, learning about marketing processes, or adapting to a new team, I wasn’t immediately great at any of those things.  In fact a week or two ago, I turned to a teammate and said something like, “These past few days have been a friendly reminder that I’m not great at my job yet and that I have a lot of room to grow.”  It’s not that I think I’m an incompetent mess, well maybe I am depending on the day 😉  It’s just that I realize I can still be so much better.  Over the past few months I’ve experienced some heat and as a result I’ve smoothed out some of my wrinkles and grown.  I believe the Andrew Embry of today could run circles around the Andrew Embry of 7 months ago.  My hope is that in a year that Andrew Embry will be so awesome that he will be running circles around my current self while doing backflips and yo-yo tricks.

The challenge: Are embracing the heat to iron out your wrinkles?  How can you be a good iron for others to help them get the wrinkles out?

Bonus challenge: Think of someone who has grown in the past few months and give them a shout out and let them know you see their progress.

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Eclipses and Sunshine (8-21-17)

I woke up this morning and wanted to share a thought about the eclipse and the sun shining.  #timely 

Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the past few months you are probably aware of the fact that today the moon will pass between the earth and the sun creating a solar eclipse.  Depending on where you are, there are some areas of the world that will be in total darkness and there will be some areas of the world that will witness a partial eclipse.

Recently we tried to explain this phenomenon to my daughters.  Alice wanted to know why it would be dark during the day time.  She asked why the sun wouldn’t be shining.  We explained to her that the sun is shining, and in fact the sun is always shining.  In this case, it will be dark because something will block the light and cast a shadow.  We also explained that even during night the sun is still shining, it’s just our part of the earth has turned its back to the sun at that point.

What does this have to do with anything?  Sometimes life sucks.  Sometimes it’s easy to get lost in the dark gloomy clouds or the shade that some event can throw our way.  It could be something that happened at work, something that is going on at home, or something else.  It doesn’t always take much to eclipse our sun and leave us with darkness.  Even if you are in darkness it doesn’t mean the light is gone.  It doesn’t mean the light has stopped shining.  The light might just be blocked, and hopefully with your strength and the strength of the people who care about you, you can outlast a period of time in the shadows and eventually find warmth again.

The only other thing I’d ask you to consider is to keep getting your shine on.  You never know how far your light reaches our who needs your light on any given day.

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Board Games, Rules, and Culture (8-16-17)

This is the last in our series about culture.  We started at a micro level looking at forming relationships and indoor rock climbing.  From there we thought about culture, base flavors, and Blizzards/concrete mixers.  Last week we looked at team culture and sending signals.  This week we will reflect on culture, rules, and the board game Sorry. 

A while back I was playing the board game Sorry with my girls (5 and 3 years old).  In case you haven’t played Sorry, it is a board game where your goal is to get your pawns out of their Start space, all the way around the board, and then to Home.  Along the way you draw cards to dictate your movements, and from time to time you bump into other players saying, “Sorry” and kicking them off the board and back to the Start.  The other important thing to know is that in order to leave your Start area you have to draw a card with a 1, a 2, or a Sorry.

We were all playing Sorry and it’s going very slow and is incredibly boring.  Everyone is kind of irritated, because unless you draw a 1, 2, or Sorry you are stuck in your Start space and you can be there for a long time.  Alice eventually asks if we can change the rules.  She wanted to be able to get out of Start easier and she didn’t want to be able to knock people off the board.  I agreed to amending the rules to get us out of Start with any card, but I told her that we were still going to knock people off the board.  I explained that we would let people out of Start with any card to speed up the game.  I also explained that we were keeping knocking people off the board, because we all have to learn how to lose and how to deal with stuff when it doesn’t go our way.  After the rule change, we played the game, and it was much faster paced and much more enjoyable.

So how does this connect to culture?  The game Sorry has rules.  However, the rules can be changed.  All we have to do is decide what the rules will be and live by them.  In the same way, while any given culture might have rules (informal or formal) that govern it, those rules can be changed.  I bring this up because often we say things like, “Well, that’s just the culture,” as if “the culture” is some entity that is outside our realm of control.  The culture isn’t some kind of external force.  The culture is comprised of individuals in relationships with each other sending out signals about what is acceptable and not acceptable (Holy connected dots Batman!) 

I’m not saying that culture change is easy.  I’m saying it’s possible.  The first thing we need to do to change a culture is decide what the culture is all about.  What are the overarching rules that govern that culture?  For example, maybe you say, “We want our culture to be about valuing each other, moving quickly, and empowering each other to make decisions.”  Those are the rules/parameters you will play by.  After you decide what you want the culture to look like, you need to decide what it looks like to live by those rules.  What does it look like for the team to show they are valued?  Maybe this is about recognizing hard work.  Maybe this is about having tough conversations with people.  Finally, we have to live those rules on a consistent basis. 

The challenge:  What rules do you want to live by?  As a leader, are you being intentional and clear about the rules your team lives by and why?  As a follower, are you influencing what those rules should be?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Culture, the Brain, and Important Signals (8-9-17)

Last week was about baseball, sending signals, and culture.  This week I want to dive a little deeper into the idea of making sure we are sending the most important signals by looking at the brain and our nervous system. 

The brain relies on the nervous systems to transmit signals throughout the body in order to make your body do what it needs to do.  What would you say are the most important signals that your brain sends on a daily basis?  I’d say the signal to have your heart beat and your lungs breathe are probably the top two.  If the brain does not clearly and consistently send those signals, then you end up being extremely unhealthy…or dead.

You’re probably wondering what this has to do with work and culture.  What do you think are some of the most important signals a team’s culture could send to its members?  I would argue that clearly and consistently telling people you CARE about them and that you VALUE them are two of the most important signals we can send.  Not only do those signals help build up a person and improve their engagement in the moment, but consistently sending those signals also builds TRUST over time.  Trust is key, because it’s the oil that keeps the team’s engine running smoothly.  I had never thought of it this way until a recent exchange with a friend of mine.  We were talking about an amazing team he was on and he described it by saying, “I think many people at this company are very smart including our team.  What made this team so special was that everyone actually cared about each other thus we bonded so well.  This creates a level of trust that allows your team to do amazing work and move with speed because you don’t always have to question or be part of the discussion/decision.”  Pretty awesome thought, right?

After this epiphany about how sending the signals of caring for people and valuing them builds trust I started thinking about my own experience.  Last week I was talking to a co-worker about culture and stuff, and I explained to her that she’s established that she cares about and values me, which is the most important thing she can do to get the best out of me.  As a result I trust her and her intentions.  She could come up to me tomorrow and say, “Andrew, you’re being stupid when you do X,” which is probably the worst way you could start a conversation.  I wouldn’t get defensive, because I know she cares about me and I trust that she wants me to get better.  A different person could come up to me and say, “I’d like to ask you a few questions about how you are doing X,” which is a nicer way to start a conversation.  However, I would be defensive because the trust is not there because I don’t know if they care about or value me. 

The above stories are from a friend and my own experience.  I’d ask you to think about your experiences.  Have you been on a team where you knew without a shadow of a doubt that you were valued and cared for?  Have you been in the opposite situation?  How did it impact you, your work, and the team’s ability to do amazing things?  What have people done to show you that they care and value you?  What have you done to show this to others?

The challenge: Are you putting in the effort to show people you CARE about and VALUE them? 

This week take the time to make sure 3 people in your life know how much you care about and value them.

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Baseball, Culture, and Sending Signals (8-2-17)

Last week was about team effectiveness, culture, and and Blizzards/Concrete Mixers.  This week is about baseball, culture, sending signals, and how those signals indicate what kind of culture you are a part of and helping to create. 

I’m guessing most of us have watched a baseball game or some other sporting even where people were using hand signals to communicate something.  I remember being on a baseball team where the coach would touch their hat and then their leg to steal, their belt to bunt, their cheek to take a pitch, etc.  In order for this system to work, the player needs to see the signal, interpret the signal, and then act on it.  If the coach gives the wrong signal or a player misinterprets a signal, then it usually leads to some kind of error that may or may not impact the game.

You’re probably wondering what this has to do with anything.  When it comes to culture, people like using words to describe a culture.  They like to say things like, “We are striving to have an inclusive culture.  We are building a culture that encourages diversity of thought.  We want people to be honest and transparent.  We want people to be real and authentic.  We value teamwork.  We want people who challenge the status quo.”  As the saying goes, talk is cheap.  Just saying the words doesn’t mean those words are reflective of the culture.

When I look at a team, I listen to how people describe the culture, but most importantly I look for signals.  I see signals, interpret them, and then take action.  I don’t respond to the first signal I see.  Instead, I look for a pattern to increase my likelihood that I’m interpreting the signal correctly.  For example, if I see people consistently having open and strong debates about things that tells me that the team is okay with people questioning things, so I openly challenge.  If I see people who are always silent and in agreement, I assume that it’s not okay to question the leadership, so I’m not as likely to voice my mind.  If I continually hear some variation of, “We’ve always believed this,” then that is a big sign that they aren’t open to anything that will disrupt the status quo.  If I notice people stopping and going out of their way to help people, I decide the team is welcoming, and I extend this warmth to others.  If the people don’t give a warm welcome I assume that the team has no desire to truly care about each other, so I mentally prepare myself to work in an environment like this.  I also pay attention to what leaders reward and recognize, because that’s a leading indicator of what people really value.  What are some of the signals you look for in new teams and with new people?

The thing is that these signals don’t just come from some official leader.  We all send signals through our words and our silence.  We send them through our actions and inactions.  All of these signals combine to show the team’s true culture, and all of this goes a long way to indicate what we truly value. 

The challenges: Are you aware of what signals you and/or your team are sending?  Do these signals match up with what you value?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Team Effectiveness, Culture, and DQ Blizzards (7-26-17)

Last week was about culture and relationships.  This week is about team effectiveness, culture, and individuals.  We’ll reflect on these things by thinking about Dairy Queen Blizzards and Culver’s Concrete Mixers.  In case you’ve never had a Blizzard or Concrete Mixer before they are ice cream treats where you take a base flavor of ice cream and add in some kind of mixer like oreos, M&Ms, fruit, etc.  It is the combination of the base flavor AND the mix-ins that create delicious gloriousness.

Growing up I would go to Dairy Queen and get an Oreo Blizzard, which was always made with vanilla soft serve ice cream as the default base and then they would mix in oreos and blend it all together.  I’m assuming Dairy Queen made it this way because they viewed vanilla as a neutralflavor.  A few weeks ago I went to Culver’s and ordered a Concrete Mixer with oreos and cookie dough.  The person at the register asked me if I wanted it made with vanilla or chocolate custard.  That simple question stopped me, because I realized that the base flavor would impact the overall Concrete Mixer experience.  A Concrete Mixer made with vanilla is very different than one made from chocolate, strawberry, mint, etc.  Each of these base flavors would drastically change the taste of the Concrete Mixer.  On that day I learned that there is NO neutral base flavor.  Some flavors would enhance the mix-ins and some make things worse

What does this have to do with work?  How good a Concrete Mixer tastes is based on the combination of the base flavor of ice cream and the mix-ins.  In a similar way, the effectiveness of any team is based on the combination of the baseline culture and the individuals you mix in.  The baseline culture of a group consists of the things that team values and the rules it follows.  The individuals consist of everything they can bring to the table from skills to energy.  In order to have something amazing, BOTH the culture base and the individuals need to fit and work well together. 

The tricky part in all of this is that it’s easy to overlook the fact that all cultures have a base flavor and that some base flavors work better with a wider array of individuals than others.Some teams have great baseline cultures that accentuate the individual flavors that people bring and the result is a high performing team.  Some teams have a baseline culture that isn’t so great, and the baseline flavor never mixes well with the individual people which results in dysfunction.  Think about your own experience for a moment.  How would you describe the base flavor of the culture of where you work?  How would you describe the base flavor of the culture of your team?  How do some of these base flavors of culture bring out the best in you?  How do some of these base flavors of culture bring you down? 

The challenge: Are you cognizant that the base flavor of any culture is NOT neutral?  What are you doing to help create a better base culture that brings out the best in us?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Culture, Relationships, and Indoor Rock Climbing (7-19-17)

This week I’d like to start a series about creating culture.  Creating culture starts with relationships, so this week I’d like for us to reflect on indoor rock climbing and forming bonds with people.

For the record, I’ve never officially done indoor rock-climbing.  I’ve always wanted to go though, so if you have suggestions on place in Indy I should try I’m open.  Anyway, let’s pretend that you and I go somewhere to do some indoor climbing.  Let’s pretend there are three areas we can climb.  We go to the first area and see that there are plenty of holds you can grab onto or stand on so climbing is relatively easy.  We go to the second area and see that there aren’t as many holds and they are further apart.  We are still able to climb, but it’s a lot more difficult.  We go to the final area and it’s a plain wall.  There aren’t any holds at all.  We have to find a way to spider-man up an entirely flat and sleek surface.  We never get anywhere and eventually give up.

So you’re probably wondering what this has to do with relationships.  Forming a relationship is like indoor rock climbing.  It’s a little easier if you have holds.  What if those climbing areas weren’t climbing areas.  What if they were people?  We will call the first climbing area Susie.  Susie is open and welcoming, willing to share multiple sides of herself.  Out of everything she shares you find out there is a lot you can relate to, so the two of you connect pretty easily.  The next climbing area is Bob.  Bob isn’t as open as Susie.  Bob shares some of himself, but he’s pretty guarded.  It takes you more time and more effort, but eventually you and Bob connect.  Let’s call the final area Sam.  Sam doesn’t ever make the effort to connect and doesn’t want to.  You try, but you and Sam can’t ever get on the same page.

Now think about work and life.  Do you know a Susie, Bob, or Sam?  How is interacting with those people different?  Are you a Susie, Bob, or Sam at work?  Are you a Susie, Bob, or Sam at home or some other setting?  Your willingness to be open and to try to build a relationship with others is important, because relationships are the bedrock of any culture.  If you don’t invest in building up those relationships you can’t gather the trust you need in order to take you and your team to the next level.  With all that said, there are a lot of factors that impact how much you are willing to share and how much you are willing to invite people to get to know you.  I’m not asking us all to be like Susie.  What I am challenging us all on is to look at ourselves and determine if we are doing enough to at least give a person who is trying to form a relationship a hold to grab onto.

The challenge:  What can you do to build better relationships and a better culture?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Mind-Body Connection and Fear (7-12-17)

Last week was about making the time to take care of yourself and your team in order to ensure you and your team are ready to perform.  This week is about the mind body connection as it relates to fear.  You’re probably familiar with the concept of the mind body connection.  The idea is that your brain and body are linked, so what happens to one impacts the other.  Recently, I learned a lesson about this from virtual reality. 

My virtual reality story.  In real life I stood on a board on the ground that was about ½ inch thick.  Then, I put on the virtual reality headgear.  When they turned on the program I was hundreds of feet in the air over a tree covered mountain.  My goal was to walk on the board to a small tower.  Sounds simple right?  The problem is that I’m afraid of heights.  The moment the program turned on I froze in fear, because all I could see was myself high above the trees and a deadly abyss below.  I just kept babbling, “Dude,” over and over again.  Meanwhile, my team laughed in the background.  (It’s great have a supportive group of people around you.)  At one point I said something along the lines of, “My brain knows this is not real, but my eyes and body think it is.”  I kept repeating to myself, “This isn’t real,” and eventually I was able to walk across.

Oversimplification of the century, your brain has a primal part that’s focused on raw emotions and survival and then it has a more rational part.  Everything is fed through the primal part first.  In this story, my eyes saw danger and I froze.  I was completely amygdala hijacked (click HERE to learn more about this).  I was frozen, because my eyes saw danger and my body responded accordingly.  The truth is that the danger didn’t really exist.

So what does this have to do with work?  Our flight or fight system and amygdala hijacks can still happen at work.  How many times have you found yourself overly anxious about asking a question or making a “dumb” comment?  How often have you been terrified of making a mistake?  I’d argue that we have these reactions, because our bodies sense fear.  In some ways it’s like virtual reality, because we sense fear but the real risk is minimal.  I wasn’t actually going to fall hundreds of feet off of a mountain.  I could have fallen ½ inch off of a board, but that’s it.  Likewise, when it comes to these situations at work, our bodies might think that asking the question, making a comment, or making a mistake might feel like you are going to fall hundreds of feet to your death, but probably not.  If we can breathe and use our rational brain to analyze the situation, I believe that we will often see the risk isn’t as great as we thought it was or we will find a way to mitigate that risk as appropriate.

The challenge: Are you letting the fear control you or are you pausing and thinking through the fear to find what the risk really is?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry