Tag: self-reflection

Impostor Syndrome and the Positive Whisper (10-30-24)

This week is about impostor syndrome and listening to positive whispers. I’ve been reflecting quite a bit about everything going on at work, all the challenges, and my attempts to lead through those things.  All of that reflecting ultimately crystalized into something.  I was in a meeting yesterday, there was great energy, and it’s like I heard a little positive whisper that said, “You’re doing pretty good at this stuff.” 

Normally, Impostor Syndrome would catch a whiff of this positive whisper and rush to crush it.  However, this time, I didn’t give Impostor Syndrome the chance to snuff out that flame.  This time, I sat with the positive whisper for a bit.  I shielded the whisper from being snuffed out, and I slowed down to stay with the whisper before rushing off.  It was kind of like stepping outside of my body for a second, as the positive whisper kept talking to me, “Andrew, you may not be perfect, but you’re a lot of the things you appreciate from your favorite leaders.  You’re challenging the status quo, casting a vision, navigating ambiguity, engaging people, and making trade-offs.  You’re doing pretty good at this stuff.  Make sure you see that.”

Let’s make some connections.  Have you ever had Impostor Syndrome crush your momentum and belief in yourself?  It happens to me all the time.  I’ll start to have a positive thought like, “I’m doing well,” and then Impostor Syndrome will say, “But you messed up all of these things.  Look at that chain of mistakes.  They are going to find out you aren’t the real deal.”  It wasn’t until I heard the positive whisper that I realized how incredibly deafening and all-consuming Impostor Syndrome can be.  Have you ever realized this?  We are so quick to allow the Impostor Syndrome to be loud and tear us down.  At the same time, we are so slow to protect and encourage the fragile positive whisper.  It doesn’t have to be this way.  If we are willing to sit with the positive whisper, often that’s enough for it to grow and get through.

The challenge: Will you hear the positive whisper?  How can you sit with and encourage the positive whisper?

Bonus: If you don’t hear the positive whisper right now allow me to be that, “You’re an awesome human.  You’re doing a nice job of hanging in there.  You’re pretty good at this life stuff.”

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Therapy and Radical Acceptance (9-18-24)

Last week was about therapy and thought traps.  This week we are diving into the powerful idea of radical acceptance.  I consider this to be my favorite therapy tool and mindset shift.  This email is a bit longer, because I wanted to dig a little deeper into the concepts and I’m throwing in a couple examples.

During one of my therapy sessions I was talking about my problems and saying things like, “I keep running into X, and it sucks.  It SHOULD be going like this.  And I’m facing Y situation.  It SHOULD NOT be going like that.  It SHOULD be happening like this.”  Have you ever been overwhelmed by the thought of how things should be vs how they are?  After listening to me, my therapist hit me hard like a punch straight to the gut with an insight that cut to the core of my problem.  She said something along the lines of, “You are making yourself suffer twice.  You’re suffering the first time because the challenge you are facing is hard.  That’s true.  It is hard.  You are making yourself suffer a second time, because you are refusing to accept reality for what it is.  Instead of embracing reality you keep saying this SHOULD or SHOULD NOT be happening.  You are creating unrealistic expectations, and that’s causing you even more pain because they can’t be fulfilled.” 

I sat there stunned for a moment, and then my therapist talked to me about the concept of radical acceptance.  Radical acceptance is focused on embracing what IS instead of what should be.  The main idea is learning how to OBJECTIVELY look at a situation to see the real facts, challenges, and constraints.  There is no judgment about whether it’s good or bad.  It’s merely looking at the situation and saying, “This is reality.  This is the challenge I need to contend with.”  I can’t express how important of a mindset shift this was for me.  Once I learned how to practice radical acceptance, I could step back from a situation and be objective.  Once I learned how to embrace radical acceptance, the emotions of a situation no longer had such a hold on me.  Being objective and creating distance helped me analyze what was occurring, so I could see potential solutions and get unstuck. 

What does this have to do with anything?  Whether it’s your personal life or work, it’s easy to get swept up in what SHOULD happen, and to become so focused on this that you end up suffering twice when reality doesn’t meet your expectations.  Instead, we need to practice radical acceptance, embrace reality, and then problem solve.  Below are a couple of real examples from my recent life.  Do either of these sound familiar?

Too much work example– I started by telling myself this, “We have too much work to do.  We SHOULD have more headcount or more resources.  This is crap!  I guess I’ll just have to work zillions of hours.”  Does this ring any bells?  Then I practiced radical acceptance with the team and the conversation turned into this, “The reality of the situation is that we have too much work to do.  We don’t have the resources or people to do it all, and there are no indications that we are going to get more people or resources anytime soon.  The only way we can get it all done is if we work ourselves to death.  I don’t want that for any of us.  Now let’s problem solve.  It won’t be easy, but we need to make choices.  What do we value?  What can we prioritize?  Okay, we value X, so we are going to focus all our efforts on Y and Z and leave everything else alone.  I’ll start emailing folks to tell them we won’t help with their request right now, and/or we will offer them ______ because we are already doing that so they can try that if they want to but we won’t be doing anything special for them.”  The situation didn’t necessarily get easier, but practicing radical acceptance enabled me to problem solve without suffering twice.  Also, it might sound weird to say but practicing radical acceptance also has enabled me to be more zen, even in the midst of a lot of chaos.

Health and fitness example– I have what will likely be my last obstacle course race of the year in about 1.5 weeks.  For the past couple of weeks I’ve been beating myself up.  I’ve been saying things like, “I SHOULD have lifted more.  I SHOULD have done more dead hangs.  I SHOULD have ran more.  I SHOULD have been better with all aspects of my health.  I can’t believe I didn’t do those things.  I suck.  I SHOULD NOT feel like I’m more or less starting over.”  Have you ever beat yourself up over your health and fitness goals?  The reality of the situation is that I’m not happy about this, but it is the situation I’m in.  Due to a wide variety of reasons, I did not train as much as I would have liked, and there is NOTHING I can do to change that.  Rehashing it over and over again does not help.  Practicing radical acceptance led me to realize that I have a limited number of days left to prepare for the race.  I have the opportunity to make the most of those.  Most importantly, the reality is that even if I didn’t train as much as I would have liked, I can still have a lot of fun at the race.  I’m no longer beating myself up, and I feel so much better.

The challenge: How will you practice radical acceptance to embrace reality for what it is?

Resources- Here are a few videos I watched about radical acceptance.

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Therapy, Symptoms, and Root Causes (9-4-24)

Last week was about acknowleding things are heavy.  This week is about therapy, symptoms, and root causes. 

At this point in my therapy process, I’ve listed all the challenges I have going on in life.  From there, we talk about the negative impact this is having on me.  Being honest and vulnerable, I was participating in a lot of numbing/avoidance behaviors.  For me that looks like eating and drinking too much junk, doomscrolling, laying around vs moving my body, and binging on video games.  When I’m mentally healthy, I might partake in those behaviors in moderation and get joy from them.  During this time period, I was doing those things to escape instead of dealing with my issues.

It would have been easy to assume we should start going after those avoidance behaviors with things like, “Try to eat healthier,” but those were just the things on the surface.  We needed to find the root cause.  I had become so overwhelmed by things that I started telling myself a story that sounded like this, “All of this sucks.  It won’t ever get better.  I’m stuck and powerless.”  Have you ever felt this way?  After talking about this, I recognized this was the root of my problem.  I had convinced myself I was stuck and powerless, and that prevented me from dealing with these challenges.  I needed to address this feeling.

What does this have to do with anything?  Whether it’s therapy, marketing, or a business challenge, it’s EASY to see something on the surface and ASSUME that is what you need to solve for.  However, solving the surface level issue is often a temporary fix at best.  You can’t make meaningful progress, until you address the root of the issue.  In my case, the issue wasn’t necessarily that I was demonstrating avoiding behaviors .  The issue is that I started to believe I was stuck and powerless.  Addressing this and learning to let go of this has made all the difference.

The challenge: Will you address symptoms or root causes?

Have a jolly good day,

Therapy and Acknowledging Things are Heavy (8-28-24)

Carrying A Heavy Weight Stock Photos, Pictures & Royalty-Free Images ...Last week was about therapy and being brave enough to ask for help.  Thanks for everyone who reached out with kind words, and I’m proud of everyone who is committed and/or recommitting to therapy and taking care of themselves.  This week is about therapy and acknowledging things are heavy.

After the initial part of our conversation, my therapist asked me to talk more about what was going on.  I started listing everything off.  “I have these 3 things going on with each kid, and there’s no playbook for this.  Everything is on fire at work, AND there are 4 to 5 challenges I’m trying to sift through and navigate.  There are these 3 other things happening in life.  My shoulder is in constant pain.  I haven’t been working out.  I can’t even tell you the last time I slept well.  I feel like crap.  I’m focusing on holding it together, so I can keep stuff moving.” 

After listening to me rattle off all those things, my therapist looks me in the eyes and says, “That’s a lot.”  I immediately discount her comment and in complete seriousness reply, “It’s nothing special.  All that is just another Tuesday.”  She hears me say this.  She hears me discount her original statement.  She looks me in the eyes again and says something like, “It’s a lot.  Even if it’s not one huge event it is still a lot of things to carry, and it’s a lot of weight.  It’s a lot to carry for any human.”

What does this have to do with anything?  This was the beginning of one of my first epiphanies from therapy.  I had been so consumed by just trying to make it day to day that I had lost all perspective.  I had failed to realize that all of these things were adding up.  Has this ever happened to you? 

The moment my therapist acknowledged that I was carrying heavy weight it opened my eyes and shifted how I felt about myself.  I wasn’t weak.  I was carrying a lot of heavy things.  It also reinforced that I’m human, we are all humans, and being overwhelmed at times is just part of the broader human experience.  Have you ever felt overwhelmed like this?

The challenge: Will you appropriately appreciate and recognize the weight you are carrying?  Will you embrace that it’s okay if heavy things feel heavy?  Will you remember that you aren’t weak, sometimes things are heavy?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Therapy and Asking for Help (8-21-24)

Today marks my 600th blog!  It’s wild to think I’ve been doing this for about 12 years.  I appreciate all of you for reading and encouraging me to keep writing.

I mentioned a few months ago that after having a tough time I leveraged our Lyra benefit and reached out to a therapist for the first time.  This series is going to consist of lessons I picked up from that experience.  I’m hoping that it helps normalize therapy, and that maybe a few of the things I learned will be useful to you as well.  We will kick the series off by focusing on asking for help.

I was nervous for my first therapy session.  After a few moments of small talk, my therapist asked, “What brought you to therapy?  Why now?”  I paused for a second.  It was hard to admit I needed help.  I was used to having broad shoulders.  I was used to being able to handle anything thrown in my direction.  Eventually, I responded, “To be honest, life is kicking my a$$ and has been for a little while.  Yes, I’m making it through it, but that isn’t the same as living.  I don’t feel good about where I am or the person I am right now.  I tried a few things on my own and they didn’t work.  I decided I needed to get some help to handle life better.  That’s why I’m here.”

What does this have to do with anything?  It can be difficult to ask for help sometimes.  It can be hard, because you’re worried about others judging you, being less than, or feeling weak for needing help.   I’ve felt all those things.  Have you?  Once we start feeling those things, it’s easy to get stuck feeling those things, which prevents us from asking for the help we need.

Instead of focusing on the discomfort surrounding asking for help, I focused on the pain I was experiencing without the help.  Once I acknowledged and embraced that life was kicking by butt and how that was having a negative impact on all aspects of my life, I realized the pain of living with that far outweighed any discomfort from asking for help.  The next time you’re hesitant about asking for help for anything, ask yourself if you’d rather face the short discomfort of asking for help or if you’d rather be stuck feeling the current pain you are experiencing.

The challenge: Will you be willing to ask for help?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

What Problem does your Brand Solve? (4-10-24)

Last week we started a series about personal branding and thinking about the space you own in someone’s mind.  This week we will dive a little deeper and reflect on brands and the problem they solve.

Let’s pretend for a minute that you’re hungry and you’re looking to go somewhere to eat.  Where would you go?  What places immediately popped into your mind?  Now let’s slightly tweak the problem you’re solving.  You’re hungry AND you need to grab something relatively quickly.  Where do you go?  Maybe you think about Panera, Chipotle, or McDonalds.  Let’s say you’re hungry AND you want a place where you can kick back and chill.  Where do you go?  My first thought is Moontown, a local brewpub.  Let’s say you’re hungry AND are craving pizza.  Where do you go?  Maybe you think of a chain like Pizza Hut or maybe you think of a local pizza place. 

You might be wondering how this connects with personal branding.  All the above places could solve the generic issue of being hungry.  However, each of them is best equipped to solve a more specific hunger related problem.  Some brands focus more on speed, others on types of food, and others on the overarching experience they want to deliver.  Similarly, I often hear people articulate their personal brand by saying things like, “I’m creative.  I’m a leader.  I’m a team player.”  All those things could be true.  They are also very generic and broad.  They are often so broad that they end up representing a generic brand instead of a specific person.  When I hear things like this I often say, “I hear the buzzwords, but I don’t hear YOU.  Can you get more specific?  What do you help with?” 

I think all of us can address a variety of problems, and there are certain types of problems we are best equipped to solve.  If you’re looking for someone to build detailed process maps, do hardcore editing of documents, code computers, understand/apply regulatory rulings, have/share deep medical expertise, embrace rigid standards, or run a large multi-billion dollar company I am NOT your guy.  Those are all important skills, and they are NOT my strengths or passions.  However, if you need someone to communicate something clearly and effectively, move people to take action, love/care for people, transform ambiguity into smaller parts so you can attack a problem, look at things from perspectives you wouldn’t think of, tell bad dad jokes, keep it real, bring the energy and funktastic flavor, or rock an awesome beard then call me 😉  Those are all problems that align with my passion and strengths.  Those are the kinds of problems I’m more uniquely positioned to solve.  That is what my brand is about (or at least I hope that’s how you experience me).

The challenge: What specific problems do you solve?  When should people call you vs someone else?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Professional and Personal Quarterly Check-in (3-27-24)

This week’s entry is about quarterly check-ins for work and for yourself.  It’s a longer email, because I’m including my own quarterly self-assessment as an example.

As we finish out the end of Q1, I find myself doing a lot of reflecting on the progress that has been made on various projects and tasks at work.  I’m asking myself things like, “Where are we now compared to where we were at the beginning of the quarter?  Were we able to achieve our goals?  If so, how do we keep up the momentum?  If not, what should we adjust to do better?  How can we ensure we regroup and are clear and focused for Q2?”  It seems like a perfect moment to pause, reflect, regroup, and plan before attacking Q2.

What does this have to do anything?  While this is great for work, we could apply this same thinking to our personal lives as well.  What are some of your goals for 2024?  How did you do with them in Q1?  Have you stopped to CELEBRATE your progress?  Stop RIGHT NOW and celebrate something you’ve achieved.  After you celebrate, then you can reflect and see if there are any gaps.  If you have gaps, why do you have gaps?  What happened?  What got in the way?  How can you adjust to reach your goals for this quarter?

The challenge: Will you take the time to do a quarterly check-in?  What changes will you make to set yourself up for the rest of the year?

Bonus: Here is my review based on the dimensions in my life I set goals for.  Hopefully, it sparks a thought or two for you.  Also, just know if things have been tough lately, you’re not the only one.  Bottom line- tough quarter, and I need to bounce back. The picture of me flipping a tire is from my most recent obstacle course race and summarizes my Q1 in a nutshell. It was all about moving heavy stuff and getting through it.  I did it, but dang it was so much harder and uglier than I wanted it to be, or it needed to be.

  • Intentionally Invest (D+)- This is my mantra for the year.  This is about being intentional about where and how I invest my energy.  Investing my energy means doing the right things that help me be the best version of myself.  I gave myself a bad grade, because I wasn’t intentional.  I got overwhelmed by a lot of things and just started recklessly spending energy.  It wasn’t helpful and it didn’t help me get to where I wanted to go.
  • Mental Health (C-)- Overall, I want to feel like I’m in a good, strong, solid mental state.  In full transparency, life and work just kicked my butt this quarter.  The stress was overwhelming and was too much for me to manage in an efficient way.  I got really lost and stuck trying to trudge through everything.  Feeling lost and stuck drained so much of my mental energy.  I spent so much energy here that I didn’t spend it on taking care of myself.  I am proud of myself for getting some help.  Moving forward, I need to use the new tools I’m developing, so I won’t get so stuck.  If I can do that, everything else will improve dramatically. 
  • Physical Health (C-)- The goal is to take good care of myself, so I can do the things I want to be able to do.  The only reason I’m not giving myself a worse grade, is because I did manage to at least hold things together enough to complete a couple of obstacle course races.  Other than that, I was inconsistent with working out, my sleep was poor, and my nutrition was abysmal.  I’m ready to do better in Q2.
  • Family (ugly hard-earned B)- The goal is to feel like I’m being an amazing husband and dad.  As they say in The Inside Job podcast, “Life gets lifey.”  It’s been a hard few months with each day seemingly bringing new challenges.  I give myself an “ugly hard-earned B” because it’s like one of those things in school where you have to put in so much effort you dang near exhaust yourself just to make it.  I was not necessarily excellent, but I found ways to hold it together.  It’s an ugly B, but one I can be proud of.  At the same time, I think some work and mental health challenges got in the way of me being on the top of my game here.
  • Career (ugly hard-earned B)- The goal is to feel like I’m delivering magic.  It’s a high bar about being in a flow state and getting incredible things done.  Similar to my Family category, challenges kept popping up and compounding on themselves day in and day out.  As a result, this quarter was filled with nothing but peaks and valleys, and they couldn’t have been further from each other.  At times I was operating at a high level, and there were other times when I felt like an ineffective burned-out piece of garbage.  This is another hard-earned ugly B that left me a little bruised and roughed up.  I believe I focused on the right things.  It just so happens that all the right things were the extremely difficult, and it was like carving through ambiguity made of marble while walking through quicksand.  It took so much energy to keep slogging forward, and I know I was burned out for a period of time.  On the positive side, I’m proud of myself for finding a way to regroup.  I feel I’m getting my energy and magic back.  All I need is a little more momentum, and then I’ll be like the Juggernaut (bonus points if you get the X-men reference)
  • Financial (B)- The goal is to ensure we are saving/investing money in the right way.  I’ve already shifted money for investments.  Some of these have been home repair things (replacing the hot water heater has been AMAZING!) and some of these are investing in fun vacations for later in the year.  I do acknowledge that I was wasting too much money on junk food and stuff as I was super stressed.

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

One Word or Phrase for 2024 (1-3-24)

Happy Wednesday and Happy New Year!

I hope you had fabulous holidays filled with joy, love, and peace.  We will kick off 2024 with a focus on identifying a word/phrase that will be your north star for the year.

At the beginning of every year, I take time to reflect and choose a word or phrase that will be my north star for the year.  I’ve found it helps ground me versus getting lost among setting too many goals.  To identify my one word/phrase I ask myself things like: What went well last year that I want to continue?  Where could things have been better?  What do I want to achieve?  How do I want to feel about things?  What do I want to give more focus and energy toward this year?  What do I want others to notice and say about me? 

In 2024 my phrase is intentionally invest.  This is all about making sure I’m being intentional about how I spend my energy.  In any given facet of my life, there is A LOT that I could do.  There are dozens, if not hundreds of different challenges I could tackle and areas of my life where I could try to grow.  Since there are so many, it’s easy to get overwhelmed and feel like I must solve all of them.  In the past, this has led to me spiraling and spending energy in too many disparate places to make the impact I want to make.  Have you ever felt like that?  With this in mind I chose the phrase intentionally invest to remind me that I need to pause and think about where I truly need to invest my time and effort to achieve the outcomes I want.  If I take a moment to pause and think, out of all of the different challenges I could tackle, there are only a handful that I should or need to work on in each phase of life.  Whether it’s health, work, social, or financial aspects of life, if I’m clear on my goals then there are usually only like 2-3 things I need to get right in order to be successful.  Intentionally investing is my nudge to remember that I need to be clear on the outcomes I want, select the investments that will get me there, and continue to make consistent daily deposits so I can reap the rewards of compound interest over time.

The challenge: What is your one word or short phrase for the year?  What is your north star? 

Bonus: On top of choosing a theme, I also build a vision board to print and keep in a visible spot at home.  The picture from this week is that vision board.

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Open Letter to 2023 (12-6-23)

Happy Wednesday,

The year is coming to a close.  I’ve enjoyed sitting near my Christmas tree and letting my mind wander for a bit.  Here is my open letter to 2023, and the lessons it gave me.

Dear 2023,

How are you doing?  By the end of 2022, I felt like I was crawling over the finish line just trying to make it.  2023, you were different.  You were a much-needed breath of fresh air.  You were good luck, new chances, and exciting achievements.  As we end our dance together, I’m thankful for the wind you put in my sails, and I feel ready for the next adventure.

  • My mantra this year was “protect my peace”.  I’m so proud of myself, because I did that better this year than I have in years past, and because of this I was a better version of myself in all aspects of life.
  • I’m in this interesting moment where I can see my kids for who they are and catch glimpses of who they might grow up to be.  I’m so proud of them for embracing who they are.  I have no idea what they will do when they grow up, but if they continue down this path, I know they will be good humans.  What could matter more than that?
  • It’s amazing to see the power of being around people who get you.  Part of the reason why my kids are flourishing is because they are finally starting to find their people.  People who accept them and embrace them for all of their nerdiness and who they are.  I’ve cried happy tears a few times just thinking about this.
  • Not only am I in love with my wife, I’m in awe of her.  I’ve watched her growth so much this year and she inspires me to be a better husband, dad, friend, and human.
  • Whenever I felt lost, it was because I had fallen out of the rhythm.  I just had to remind myself that all I needed to do was start dancing again and the rhythm would come find me.  That may not make sense to anyone else, but it’s clear in my mind.
  • Building the foundation and infrastructure in any situation is hard work, AND worthwhile work.  A house is only as strong as its foundation.
  • Sometimes strength is being able to do something to solve the problem.  Sometimes strength is sitting there with someone, beside them, sifting through their pain and emotions with them, and knowing the most compassionate thing you can do is listen and not flex your muscles.
  • I performed what might be my favorite poem I’ve ever done at work- Fitting In, Belonging, and Glass Slippers.  I look at that guy on stage performing, and while I don’t always feel he and I are the same, I hope that the people around me see glimmers of him on a regular basis.  (And I know how weird this sounds.  That guy on stage might as well be a different person, and is always the best of me.)
  • My goal at the beginning of the year was to finish a marathon length obstacle course race.  I knew it would be a major stretch, and I did it.  (Technically, the course designer messed up and made it 29 miles instead of 26.2, but who is counting besides my body that day 😉)  It was exhausting and a great reminder that there is a lot of grit inside I can tap into.  In 2023, I survived the races.  In 2024, I hope to continue racing and celebrating what my body can do.
  • I was fortunate enough to earn a promotion this year.  It’s not the promotion so much as it’s feeling seen.  It’s feeling like all the hard work, all the grinding, all the times I found a way to make something out of nothing, all the setbacks, were seen and valued.  I realize that when I don’t feel seen I tell myself stories, and none of them are ever positive.
  • Speaking of getting a new job, the work and the opportunity fill my cup so much.  So much of the role is aligned to what sparks joy in me.
  • The new job also humbled me a lot.  I’ve never been in a situation where there was so much I didn’t know or understand.  I continually had to remind myself it was okay to not always know and that it was okay to be open about not knowing.  If I had a dime for every time I’ve said, “I’m not exactly sure how the tech works, but we need it to do X”, “I don’t think I’m following, can you explain that again?”, or “I’ve never done this before, so I need you to walk me through it.” I could probably retire.  Seeing the warm faces and looks of understanding from the folks on the other end of those phrases makes my heart smile.
  • Whoa!  That was a lot in 2023!  Thank you.  I’m closing this year feeling energized and hopeful for more brightness and exciting adventures in 2024.

The challenge: If you haven’t taken the time, take a few moments to reflect on 2023 and the lessons and emotions it gave you this year.  How will these shape you moving forward?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Lifting and Different Kinds of Success (5-3-23)

Our last entry was about using proper form to help us be stronger and more efficient.  This week is about lifting and different kinds of success.

A few of months ago, I wasn’t making any progress in my physical health and lifting journey.  I wasn’t gaining strength.  My body composition was staying the same.  I didn’t feel any better.  I was doing my best at the time, but not getting anywhere.  I felt like an unsuccessful failure.  Then, I took a step back and realized that life was throwing a lot at me right both personally and professionally.  In the midst of all of that crazy, making the progress I wanted to make would have been impossible.  I came to appreciate that while I may not have been moving forward at that exact moment, the fact that I wasn’t losing ground was a win.  Despite all life was doing, it wasn’t pushing me back.  It may not have been my ideal goal, but maintaining was success in those circumstances.

What does this have to do with anything?  Often, we picture success as crossing the finish line in first place, and anything short of that is failure.  After all, as the guru Ricky Bobby once said, “If you ain’t first, you’re last!”  As a result of this thinking, we often feel like if we aren’t achieving our ideal of success then we are not worthy.  That’s how I felt during that month.  Have you ever felt that way?  In these moments, it’s important to step back and realize that victory can take many forms.  Success isn’t always about winning the race.  Sometimes, success is just finishing the race.  Sometimes, success is finding a way to keep moving forward.  Sometimes, success is not getting knocked back.  Sometimes, success is finding a way to get back up after being knocked flat on your butt.  Depending on what you’re doing, and the hand life is dealing you at the moment, success can look very different.  We need to accept that AND accept that we are always more than enough.

The challenge: Are you giving yourself the grace to understand what success looks like in the moment?

Bonus: I woke up this morning and I’m sore and exhausted, so my lifting success today is going to be taking a rest day 😉

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry