Tag: brave

Therapy and Asking for Help (8-21-24)

Today marks my 600th blog!  It’s wild to think I’ve been doing this for about 12 years.  I appreciate all of you for reading and encouraging me to keep writing.

I mentioned a few months ago that after having a tough time I leveraged our Lyra benefit and reached out to a therapist for the first time.  This series is going to consist of lessons I picked up from that experience.  I’m hoping that it helps normalize therapy, and that maybe a few of the things I learned will be useful to you as well.  We will kick the series off by focusing on asking for help.

I was nervous for my first therapy session.  After a few moments of small talk, my therapist asked, “What brought you to therapy?  Why now?”  I paused for a second.  It was hard to admit I needed help.  I was used to having broad shoulders.  I was used to being able to handle anything thrown in my direction.  Eventually, I responded, “To be honest, life is kicking my a$$ and has been for a little while.  Yes, I’m making it through it, but that isn’t the same as living.  I don’t feel good about where I am or the person I am right now.  I tried a few things on my own and they didn’t work.  I decided I needed to get some help to handle life better.  That’s why I’m here.”

What does this have to do with anything?  It can be difficult to ask for help sometimes.  It can be hard, because you’re worried about others judging you, being less than, or feeling weak for needing help.   I’ve felt all those things.  Have you?  Once we start feeling those things, it’s easy to get stuck feeling those things, which prevents us from asking for the help we need.

Instead of focusing on the discomfort surrounding asking for help, I focused on the pain I was experiencing without the help.  Once I acknowledged and embraced that life was kicking by butt and how that was having a negative impact on all aspects of my life, I realized the pain of living with that far outweighed any discomfort from asking for help.  The next time you’re hesitant about asking for help for anything, ask yourself if you’d rather face the short discomfort of asking for help or if you’d rather be stuck feeling the current pain you are experiencing.

The challenge: Will you be willing to ask for help?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Expanding Your Comfort Zone (6-26-24)

A person holding a staff Description automatically generatedLast week was about parenting and tailoring support.  This week is about expanding your comfort zone.

About a year ago, Cameron watched his sister in The Wizard of Oz on the big stage in the spring play.  This sparked Cam’s interest in doing something similar.  The only problem was that he was nervous and scared to do something like that.  This was outside of his comfort zone.  Instead of giving up, Cam thought about things he could do to expand his current comfort zone, so being on the big stage wouldn’t be such a big leap.  He started by signing up for a puppet camp last summer.  Then he signed up and participated in a fall show with younger kids.  He found he enjoyed those two things, and this gave him the confidence to be in a bigger show.  A few weeks ago, he was on the big stage in Beauty and the Beast.  He was in the ensemble, so mainly in the background as a villager and a dancing spoon.  However, he ended up getting one line.  He’s proud of being the angry mob member who yelled, “Kill him!” which started everyone to go after the Beast.  Now that he’s had one line, he’s starting to think about auditioning for a bigger part next year.  The audition is a little daunting, so he’s already thinking of smaller things he can do to stretch his comfort zone for that.

What does this have to do with anything?  Cam saw how far out of his comfort zone being on stage was, and instead of giving up he became INTENTIONAL about taking small steps to expand his comfort zone.  The first couple of shows gave him confidence.  Then practicing for the big show set up him for success.  By the time he was on the show, he was 100% feeling himself, and I loved his swagger 😉 Now think about your own life.  Are there things you’d like to do outside of your comfort zone?  Those things might seem too big and too scary now, but are there small steps you can take to move toward them?

The challenge: How will you expand your comfort zone?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry