Protecting Your Energy and Blowing Fuses (1-11-23)

Last week I talked about protecting my peace. I want to continue with this idea of protecting your energy by thinking about blowing fuses and burnout.

Have you ever blown a fuse or a had to reset the circuit breaker in your house? If so, this means the fuse was doing its job of protecting electrical circuits. A fuse is blown if too much electrical current goes through it at a given time. When the fuse blows it breaks the circuit, so electricity can’t flow through it anymore. Without the fuse, an overpowered electrical current would fry anything it ran through. To get things working again, you have to pause and replace the fuse or reset the breaker.

What does this have to do with anything? When a mechanical device is overwhelmed, the fuse blows, and it stops working. It’s then OBVIOUS that something is wrong. It won’t resume working again until it is fixed. I’d argue that we have our own internal fuses that blow when we get overwhelmed. The issue is that these fuses aren’t always obvious to other people or even ourselves. Since a blown fuse isn’t always obvious, we just keep going on and on and on until we fry our whole systems and become burned out.

If you reflect for a minute, what are some signs that you have blown a fuse and are heading toward burnout? For me, it could look like any of these things: I’m not working out, not getting enough sleep, eating junk food constantly, and I’m easily irritated at work and at home. All of these are destructive behaviors that hurt me and others around me. Now, imagine what would happen if I noticed when these things started to happen AND STOPPED to figure out how to fix things vs. continuing to go and go and go. Think of how much better off I’d be mentally, emotionally, and physically. Think of how much better off you’d be if you did the same. Part of protecting my peace this year is understanding what it looks like when I’ve blown a fuse and then STOPPING to remedy the problem.

The challenges: What are signs that you’ve blown a fuse? How will you respond once that fuse is blown?

Bonus- A year ago, I wrote a blog post about surge protectors. It’s one of my favorite entries. You can read that HERE. The surge protector entry was all about being PROACTIVE to set up things that would prevent you from being overloaded. The ideas work well with this week’s entry which is about IDENTIFYING when you are overloaded.

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

One Word, One Phrase, or One Question for the Year (1-4-23)

Happy Wednesday and HAPPY NEW YEAR!

I hope you had wonderful and relaxing holidays. For the past couple of years, I’ve started January with a series to help us have a strong start to the year. This week we will reflect on our north star for 2023.

At the beginning of every year, I take time to reflect and choose a word or phrase that will be my north star for the year. I’ve found it helps ground me vs. getting lost among setting too many goals. To identify my one word/phrase I ask myself things like: What went well last year that I want to continue? Where could things have been better? What do I want to achieve? How do I want to feel about things? What do I want others to notice and say about me?

In 2022 my phrase was, “Channel the chaos” and I did that and then some 😉 Everything was crazy from the start, and while I was able to find ways to channel a majority of the chaos into progress it did take a huge toll on me. With that in mind, my phrase this year is, “Protect my peace.” The phrase is a reminder that my primary goal is to find peace, which I view as that feeling of stillness and connection with the important things in life. Protect my peace is about understanding that I will need to take ACTION in order to maintain this peace. Inaction will allow life and its challenges to erode this peace. I’ll need to be disciplined and deliberate about creating the time and space for me to find and remain in a state of peace. Part of protecting my peace will be about putting the right boundaries in place in work and life. Part of it will be about putting the right habits in place, so I have the fuel and mental/physical/emotional health to handle life’s challenges.

The challenge: What is your one word or short phrase for the year? What is your north star?

Bonus: A few weeks ago, I saw a post on LinkedIn from Eric Johnson, co-host of The Inside Job podcast along with Dr. Nayla Bahri. He shared a story about a co-worker who decides to go with a question of the year instead of a word/phrase of the year. For example, “How are my actions aligned with my vision?” “How am I growing?” I thought this was a really cool approach. Nayla and Eric dove deeper into this idea of a new question to start the year in the most recent episode of their podcast. Go HERE if you want to give it a listen. I’m going to keep noodling on my question. The first thing that pops into mind is: How would the person I want to be respond in this situation?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

I Hope We Are All Like The Grinch (12-14-22)

This will be the last blog of 2022. If you’ve been on this distribution list for a while, you might recognize that I usually end the year with this entry. I feel it is just as relevant now as it was in years past. Besides, we watch the same holiday specials every year, so we can revisit the same holiday themed blogs, right? 😉 For our final blog of the year we will look at How the Grinch Stole Christmas!

During this holiday season I hope we are all like the Grinch. Pretty strange thing to say, right? Let me explain why I feel this way. You may know the story of the Grinch. He is a grumpy creature who decides he will try to steal Christmas from the Whos He concocts an elaborate scheme and then steals all of the presents, decorations, etc. in an effort to ruin their holiday. This negative attitude is what we often associate with the Grinch, but this isn’t the end of his story. The Grinch grows as a character, and life is all about growing, changing, and becoming better.

The Grinch has stolen the gifts, and then he hears the Whos singing. All of a sudden it hits him right as his sleigh full of gifts starts to go over the cliff. “And what happened, then? Well, in Whoville they say – that the Grinch’s small heart grew three sizes that day. And then – the true meaning of Christmas came through, and the Grinch found the strength of *ten* Grinches, plus two!” He saves the gifts from falling over the cliff, rides into Whoville, and serves the roast beast at the feast.

The reason I hope we are all like the Grinch this year is because he grows and becomes a better person. He begins filled with apathy, malice, and grumpiness, and then he allows love in and it fundamentally changes him. How have you changed and grown this year? Wherever you are right now, we have the chance to be better. Imagine how different the world be if all of our hearts grew like the Grinch’s.

Here is to all of us knowing what it feels like when our hearts grow three sizes in a day. As always, thanks so much for reading. Your reading and encouragement throughout the year is the best gift I could ever ask for. Merry Christmas, happy Hanukkah, and happy holidays for anything you might be celebrating! I hope you disconnect and recharge. I hope you find peace, love, and fulfillment.

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Open Letter to 2022 (12-7-22)

As the year comes to a close, I find myself reflecting (by my Christmas tree 😊). Here is my open letter to 2022 and the lessons it gave me.

Dear 2022,

How’s it going? If 2021 was a year heading in the right direction, you were a constant barrage of curveballs and challenges.

My theme this year was “Channel the Chaos.” I don’t know if I could have picked a more accurate theme. Maybe I’m a prophet. #Embrydamus
I felt like a lion tamer for most of the year. Instead of lions, I did my best to tame internal processes, random fires, and a slew of challenges. Anyone else feel this way? I was bitten and clawed along the way, but still here. Persevering matters, even when it’s ugly.
Speaking of persevering, 2022 continued to teach me grit. I feel like I spent 49.9% of the year getting knocked down, and 50.1% of the year standing back up, shaking off the hit, and leaning in again. This seemed consistent whether it was at work or at home. I don’t think those are the ideal percentages, but as long as I get up one more time than I was knocked down, it’s a win. Next year I’m hoping to be more at 30/70 or something 😉
My goal every year is to do magic, to do something so incredible that the only explanation for it is sorcery. In my best moments this year (as a husband, dad, friend, employee), I think I had magic and then some. In my best moments I felt like I was a wizard, seeing all the elements come together. Even though those moments were fleeting, they were beautiful.
Every year I gain a deeper appreciation for health. This year I gained a deeper appreciation for how intertwined mental, emotional, and physical health are. I cherish these things on a new level and will fight harder to keep them.
I was reminded of how amazing my family is. I don’t know of too many people stronger than my wife and kids. How blessed am I to have them? In so many ways my wife is the model of the parent I want to be, and my kids have so much more resilience than I ever would have possessed at their age. #blessed
Growth is a tricky thing. You don’t always see it or feel it as it’s happening. I learned to not confuse the lack of feeling growth with the lack of growth. If I’m being super honest, I didn’t even see or think about my growth at work this year until yesterday during my end of the year conversation when my boss started pointing stuff out to me. I was too blinded by surviving the grind to see it.
At the beginning of the year, I had a goal to do 4 obstacle course races. I did 5, including my Spartan Trifecta. May not be a big deal to some folks, but it was a stretch goal for me. It reminded me of how strong I can be physically, mentally, and emotionally. We always have more strength than we think we do.
Not meeting your original goals is not the same thing as failing. Sometimes circumstances change, and the definition of success in new circumstances might be different than what it was in the prior circumstances. You can only play the cards you are dealt. Sometimes playing a good hand with bad cards is more impressive than playing a great hand with good cards, even though it won’t always be recognized as such.
I was stretched so thin this year that I always felt I was falling short and failing people, and this hurt my soul a bit. At the same time, just because I felt I was failing everyone didn’t mean everyone felt I was failing them. I learned to be careful of the stories you tell yourself, because even if there is truth in them it doesn’t always mean they are true.
People are beautiful. Also, people can have ugly actions. I try to tell myself that when people act in an ugly way, it’s because they are hurt and afraid. It helps sometimes, but not always.
Good people are all you really need to get through tough things. As long as you have a few good people in your life you are set.
Life is measured in moments. I can’t tell you what I did most days of the year, but there are some moments that stick out as clear as day.
I’m looking forward to taking time to recharge, adding some fuel to my internal fire, and getting my shine on in 2023.

Those are things going through my head. Yours might be similar or different. Whatever you’re feeling is okay. Your feelings are your truth.

The challenge: If you haven’t taken the time, take a few moments to reflect on 2022 and the lessons and emotions it gave to you this year. How will these shape you moving forward?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Why are our Challenges Challenging? (11-30-22)

I hope you had a fabulous Thanksgiving. We are winding down for the year, so the next few entries will be things to think about as you wrap up. This week is about reflecting on why our challenges were challenging this year.

As you might know, obstacle course racing is my new hobby. Let me be clear. I’m not good at these races. I fail a lot of obstacles and I’m slow. With that said, usually I can get up and over the 6-foot wall obstacle with little difficulty. I have the strength and skill to do that one (other obstacles, not so much 😉) Recently, I completed a race in Arizona. When I got to the 6-foot wall I struggled a few times before I got over it. I started thinking about why I had an issue with something that I can normally do on the first try. I realized a few things. Usually, the 6-foot wall is one of the first obstacles and happens early in the race around mile 1. Also, I was used to races in the Midwest where I was running on dirt and grass. This particular 6-foot wall came around mile 3, after I had completed other obstacles and spent a fair amount of time running on loose sand. Clearing the 6-foot wall on its own is challenging, but doable. Clearing the 6-foot wall after getting through a series of challenges BEFORE I ever got there, made it more difficult because my legs and body were more tired than usual.

What does this have to do with anything? As we finish the year, we likely will have some kind of end of year discussion. During this time, you’ll likely be asked to talk about your successes as well as the areas where you struggled and could improve. When you think about those areas where you could have improved, spend time thinking about why it was difficult. Was it difficult because you didn’t have the knowledge or skillset to do it? Or was it something you normally could have done, but it became a challenge since it came after so many other obstacles that popped up in your path? As I reflect, there were some things I didn’t do as well as I had hoped, because they were new to me. There were other situations where I had the skills and talent to handle them well, but since they came at the end of a slew of barriers, I didn’t handle them as well as I could have. As you can see, these are two different root causes for why you could struggle with something, and each root cause has its own set of solutions. I know I’m continuing to reflect on what I can do to improve in each instance.

The challenge: Why did you find certain things challenging this year?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Thanksgiving and Appreciating the Inputs and Outputs (11-21-22)

This week is about Thanksgiving and being thankful for both outputs and inputs.

On Thursday I’ll have Thanksgiving with the in-laws and we will have things like: turkey, mac n cheese, rolls, mashed potatoes, multiple pies, my mother-in-law’s spectacular stuffing (my favorite thing), and more. It will taste delicious, like it does every year. Here’s the thing. That food doesn’t miraculously appear on its own. It requires a lot of time, effort, energy, and resources from a lot of people to make it happen. It’s the time, patience, and care spread over hours that leads to a great turkey. It’s investing hours in finding the ingredients, preparing the ingredients, and pulling it all together that leads to an amazing pie. On Thursday, I’ll be thankful for the food AND for the people and all of the effort they put in to prepare a great meal and a space to enjoy each other.

What does this have to do with anything? In our analogy this week we should be thankful for the outcome (delicious food) and we should appreciate all of the inputs (the people, time, effort, and resources it takes to pull this off). This same thinking should apply to the work we do.

We live in a world obsessed with outcomes and final deliverables. While we are obsessed with these things, we don’t always acknowledge the sacrifice and effort that goes into creating something great. Have you ever created a deliverable that was used and then felt that your contributions weren’t quite appreciated? I have. Have you ever felt that people didn’t fully understand or appreciate the amount of effort, energy, and resources you had to pour into making something successful? I have. Now think about when things went differently. What did it feel like when you and your efforts were appreciated as much as what you delivered? This always makes me feel valued and that I matter.

The challenge: How are you recognizing the effort and energy that goes into the deliverable vs. just recognizing the deliverable itself?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Chili, Versatility, and our Talents (11-16-22)

Last week was about chili and simplicity. Our final chili related entry is about chili, versatility, and our talents.

Pretend for a minute that you’ve made a big pot of chili. What do you do with the leftovers? Do you just keep eating bowls of chili or do you use the chili in different ways to make something delicious? At first, I might eat another bowl or two of normal chili, and then I’ll start mixing it up. I might use that leftover chili to make chili cheese fries. I might pour some chili on top of nachos for an extra bit of flavor. I might even make chili dogs with the leftovers. I might mix some chili, scrambled eggs, and shredded cheese together for a nice breakfast. I might even get crazy, make some crispy tater tots in the air fryer and pour chili and queso over them (dang, I’m hungry now!) The point is that chili is great on its own AND it is versatile enough to be used in other ways to create other incredible foods.

What does this have to do with anything? The above story could be a metaphor for how we view our talents and the talents of others. We all have our own unique strengths (chili). It’s easy to only think about using those strengths in the same way in the same projects in the same roles over and over and over again (eating leftover bowls of chili). We might see a new challenge and think, “I’m not sure my strengths work with that.” Have you ever felt that way? I have. We might also look at people and say, “They are really talented at X, but I don’t think that carries over to Y.” In essence, we’ve told people that they are a bowl of chili, and they can’t be anything more than that. Before you know it, we have pigeonholed ourselves or other people into what we THINK they are versus all the different ways they could use their talents. We know that chili is great as a bowl of chili AND it has the potential to be great in so many other dishes. This is our chance to realize that all of us have talents that can be used in a variety of ways to bring more flavor to the world.

The challenge: Are you seeing the potential in your strengths and talents to be used in different ways? Are you seeing that same potential in the strengths and talents of others?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Chili and Warmth (11-9-22)

Last week was about chili and being inclusive. This week is about chili and warmth.

I love the taste of chili. It’s the blend of spices with the meat and the beans, the crackers crumpled up just right, and some shredded cheese on top melting into deliciousness. I love the taste of chili, but if I’m being honest, I can think of several other foods that have a better flavor profile than chili. It’s not just the taste of chili, but the warmth of chili that makes it so good. There is something about being cold, bundled up in a hoodie, and eating a hot bowl of chili. There is something about feeling the warmth fill your stomach and then spread through the rest of your body. All of a sudden you feel comfy and cozy and settled. Do you ever feel that way after chili or is it just me?

What does this have to do with anything? Chili is more than just a flavor. It’s also the warmth that comes with it. In a similar way, interactions with people are more than just the flavor, but also the warmth that comes with those words and actions. Think about the people who have made you feel all warm, comfy, and cozy. Do you remember the specific words they said, or do you remember the warmth they provided?

People are busy and stressed. People are overworked and exhausted. People are trying to find that reservoir of energy to push through until the end of the year. Things are a little cold right now. People are feeling a little cold. I think we all could use a little more warmth. A hug. A smile. A high five. A sincere thank you. A simple note of appreciation. While these small acts may not solve all problems, they will bring a little extra warmth into a cold world and that has to be worth something.

The challenge: How will you bring some extra warmth into your interactions today?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Chili and being Inclusive (11-2-22)

Last week was about chili and appreciating simplicity. This week is about chili and intentionally being inclusive in day-to-day life.

About 2 years ago I wrote a blog series about inclusion and my wife being a vegetarian. You can read that entry and any of my past blogs by going HERE. In summary, when my wife comes to my parents’ house for dinner, my mom makes vegetarian options, so Diane is included. This makes Diane feel cared for and valued. This week’s story takes this to the next level.

I take my kids over to my mom and dad’s house for a family lunch almost every Sunday, and my wife stays home so she can have a day to herself after holding it down with the kids all week (teaching, taking care of them, running the house, putting up with me 😉 etc.) Recently, we went over to have chili. My mom makes chili with beans and ground beef. As we were leaving, my mom asked if I’d take some home to Diane. That’s when my mom reveals that she made Diane her own separate small pot of chili WITHOUT meat. Isn’t that awesome? Now, my mom didn’t want to be praised for this or anything, she just wanted to show Diane she cares about her. I get home from my mom and dad’s house, and I tell my wife that my mom made her a separate pot of vegetarian chili and my wife simply said, “She’s the best!” You could tell my wife felt loved and appreciated.

What does this have to do with anything? It’s great that my mom makes vegetarian options when my wife comes over for dinner. It’s even better that my mom takes action when Diane isn’t around. In a similar way, it’s appropriate to focus on diversity and inclusion when we are in forums focused on those things or celebrating holidays. It’s even better, when we are consistently putting in the work because it’s the right thing to do. It’s even better, if we are making these actions just part of what we do vs. some kind of action that should be celebrated because we are showing initiative.

The challenge: Do an honest assessment. How are YOU consistently and intentionally being inclusive in day-to-day life? Where could YOU improve?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry

Chili and the Beauty and Power of Simple Things (10-26-22)

This week is about chili and the power and beauty of the simple things.

Imagine for a moment. It’s a cold crisp day. You can see your breath when you’re outside. You’ve been out running errands and you come home. You still have a little bit of a chill in your bones. When you get inside you smell it. A nice pot of chili is cooking on the stove. You scoop yourself out a bowl, add a little cheese and crackers, and you eat. That scene would describe a perfect fall day for me. It’s hard to beat a good bowl of chili on a cold day. There isn’t anything fancy about chili. It’s only a few key ingredients. The power is in the simplicity. A few ingredients, a hot bowl on a cold day, and it’s perfection.

How does this connect with anything? We live in a world where so much is at our fingertips. We live in a world where it is easy to have more and more and more. It’s easy to get lost going after the next thing with all the newest features. There’s nothing wrong with new things, but sometimes all of this causes us to get lost in a world of complexity. Sometimes, what we really need are the simple things. There is power and beauty in a short walk outside. There is something magical about a sitting around a bonfire or a table and sharing stories with friends and family. There aren’t too many things better than curling up and reading a book or magazine. Some of my best memories were formed playing simple card games. There is hidden beauty locked inside the world of simple things.

The challenge: Will you stop to appreciate the simple things?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry