Last week was about asking for specific feedback.  With Halloween in mind, this week is about chocolate, feedback, and relativity.

If I asked if you thought Hershey chocolate is good, what would you say?  I’d assume you’d say it is good, if you like chocolate 😉 What if I asked you to rate a Hershey kiss vs. Dove chocolate?  Would that change anything?  What if I made you compare Hershey vs. Dove vs. Lindt vs. Godiva vs. Ghiradelli vs. Belgian chocolate?  I’m assuming that once you started to compare Hershey against other brands it might shape how good Hershey really is.  This also depends on the criteria we are using.  If I asked you to choose a favorite based on taste alone, you might choose one kind of chocolate.  If I asked you to choose a cost-effective chocolate to make a lot of smores, you might choose something else.

You might be wondering what the connection is to feedback.  The above story illustrates how feedback is relative.  Is Hershey chocolate good?  Well, it depends.  Having Hershey chocolate is better than having no chocolate 😉 As you compare across different kinds and brands of chocolate, Hershey might rise or fall.  Your feedback on the quality of Hershey is relative to the criteria you are using and what you are comparing it too.  In a similar way, most people are “good”.  Most people do work that is “good”.  However, none of this happens in a vacuum.  Everything is relative to what is going on around it. 

It’s not enough just to tell someone they are good or to think you’re good.  As we give and receive feedback, we need to understand who or what it is relative to.  Understanding this is what highlights our room for growth.  For example, you might be good for someone new to your role (which is something to celebrate), but you might be near the bottom compared to more experienced people at that level (which gives you room to grow).  You might be great talent at your current level (which is awesome) but compared to people competing for a promotion you are in the middle of the pack (which identifies gaps for you to work on).  You might have been good early in your role (which is something to be proud of), but now the bar is higher (so you need to assess how you stack up to that new bar).  You might be great in X skill, but Y is the skill that is valued (and you have to decide if you want to develop Y skill or not). 

The challenge: As you give and receive feedback, who or what is that relative to?

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry