This will be the last in my series about lessons I’ve learned from being a parent.  This week is all about taking time to understand the bigger picture before making a judgment.

We had a fabulous time on vacation.  However, if you would have seen my family on Monday afternoon, it would have been easy to conclude that we were all bad people who hated each other, because we were so grumpy and irritable.   If you took a step back and looked at the bigger picture, you might think a little differently.  We had been on vacation for 2 weeks and desperately wanted to get home.  We had been traveling all day.  We were exhausted, rushed, overwhelmed, etc.  Understanding all of this, you would likely conclude that we were good people who just had a long day.  You’d give us grace and patience.

What does this have to do with anything?  Have you ever had a negative experience with someone and instantly decided that they were bad?  I have.  Someone has been in a bad mood, and I’ve made the snap decision that they must be a jerk.  Someone didn’t do something well at work, and I’ve made the snap decision that they don’t have the right skills.  It’s so easy to make judgments based on a snapshot in time vs on the bigger picture and a confirmed pattern of behavior.  The majority of time, these snap decisions are wrong. 

Maybe the person is a jerk, or maybe they are going through something incredibly difficult in life and they are carrying more stress than usual.  I know that I’ve unintentionally lashed out at people, when I carried stress that had nothing to do with them.  Maybe the person doesn’t have the necessary skills, or maybe they had a different vision for what was supposed to occur or maybe they are just human and made a mistake.  I know I’ve made mistakes before.  Making these snap judgments often lead to the worst possible paths for all parties involved.

The challenge: Will you take the time to see the bigger picture before passing judgment?

Bonus: The pic is my family on the boat outside of Gibraltar.  You might notice our travel sheep.  He is a special stuffed animal who ONLY goes on vacations with us, so the other stuffed animals are left at home.  I can tell you’re jealous. 😉  Fun fact.  The travel sheep went through the security at the airport, fell out of the bin in the x-ray machine, and confused the machine so bad that it caused about 8 bins of stuff to have to be rescanned.  That sheep is baaaaaa-d news!

Have a jolly good day,

Andrew Embry